ShrinKinG Tears

2008-02-28T23:07:00.002+08:00

Reminise.
Look at the world we all live in now, so different from 1 year ago.
Makes me wonder, how is everyone doing.

Life has it's ups n downs.
Juz pray you guys are doing as well as i m, no, even better.
Been busy all along, the expected was not really as pleasant as it was.

Superior wears masks, it's so hard to read them sometimes. Juz make feel like swearing at them, but yet, this is what they are. Uneducated things made to serve n serve for only something, which they do not even understand. But, it is their call of duty.

Call of duty which does not invoke feelings. For me, i tink i belonged to the wrong place sometimes. Those wif feelings are barely left alive there. It's really a wonder somehow :) But as long as it remains to be 1, there's left much to reap from it, draw from it, learn from it.

We muz not forget, we draw blood into strangers whom we assumed enemies, yet we might be the one healing them. Let bygones be bygones, my memory ever lost. It's tiring to keep remembering vengence, yet it's best served cold.

Somehow, i juz hate it. But have to accept it. What to do? Yawnxz. Juz bear with it and change for the better. No doubt, mistakes will be made but well, i'll juz pray to karma i really hope that it happens to whoever that angered me, to really know it suxs.

Becoz u'r not juz uneducated, u made a hell out of some1's life becoz of ur comments.
N even before you realise, you made it worse.
N right in the eyes of many, i smell a rat.

For whom you see in eyes, comes favour plenty to try.
For what that sores in thy eyes, foul n nonsense takes the place.
Juz when will you stop being so childish?

Screaming it loud in my head. Theory in 2 weeks, having loads of fatigue coz of stress.
This is why, i really regret not going for their audition, with out even trying.
To belong to a place where i wanna be.

2008-01-04T10:18:00.000+08:00

Hapy new Year, pull ur ear !!
=X Back..after like 1 month?
Enjoyed the 1month seriously, no school, not much worries..
Concerts, Music n COM!!!

Missed out a big deal that's happening at the JC part, sorry dudes =X
I tink my absence has been accounted aways. hahax.
More worries add on to the pool now as the new year comes.

Guys go army
Gals go ravy
& everyday starts raining.

Pay the adult fare,
it's so dam unfair
yet it's everywhere.

Ouch. adult fare is exp. Forgot to tap card, eats up $1.68..
So even if u took 1 stop, n forgot to ti di... congratxs, u're 1.68 poorer.

New Year resolution:
-To erase all unhappy past memories of 2007
(THOUGH, some can nv be erased)
-Planning for the whole year
( i muz not b late for her anni this time, been 4 years ler =X haix)
-Complete Chopin's waltz & Mozart's works.
( a rather v. ambicious plan, i'll try my best )
-Most importantly, balance up all aspect of life alongside with NS.
( Jc has screwed it up, hope it can adjust back)

When results come, i'm back to square 1. =X anticipated. On that hand, i wish everyone all the best n soar to the courses u wan =)

-SOTA has started.. hhhmmmm... interesting.

2007-12-06T23:46:00.000+08:00

Dunno what's wrong wif blogger nowadays, maybe coz of my browser, on top of that, it works as a dis incentive to blog.
What's more, bloggin seriously has been made worse with many uninvited prophesy, which inturn caused more harm than de white pain which they initially were to be.

Looked at the sky everyday, it turns bright to dark.
Looking at the water everyday, staring at the shadow of myself.
i seriously miss someone. Parents are on holidays. Returning next week, band fest's next week. Everything seems to happen with next week.

Sometimes, i wonder why winning is so important. Perharps, in that one's eyes, other things meant nothing to him. Even my "bro" has learnt it that way.. but it seems like a hopeless situation. Love has failed to change what i expected to have. Maybe all this while his exsistance is juz there, to exist n to forgot.
When u wanna win everything, try to win death =) I so love to see you try.
Why bother making corrections, when u keep making the mistakes..
Some say it's character whilst it could be attention seeking. Whatever it is, i dun care. I pondered over n asked myself : all this while, you give in to him, & all u get is ???, which ultimately comes down to nothing. No, i'm not going to hate you, neither would i even wanna be bothered with you now.
Think about it, i maybe xiao qi, but it's not going to be nice to stab someone, then clean up de wound for them. The scar remains. The pain remains. Jokes are jokes, but seriously sometimes they are played to far in some's hands.
Nvm, after all, what's left are all bull shit. Ppl think gossiping is fine, yet in the end it's that which killed them. Lolx.. the crack will open more. Let's juz hope that nothing will disturb de peace, tat's all. Missing places would be "filled" soon.
It all happens with the v. basic rules of us - others b4 self.
When de day for choices comes, i won't be suprised by what u choose.

"it is a little thing in our lives, yet it make a big impact on others."

if u were bored reading, u can ignore de " 2nd para". It's meant to be unreadable. Days are much better with more music, maple & stoning! Theory exam for Grade 6 is coming up. =X
will try updating once in a while, it's de blogger that piss me off sometimes. On top of that, tis place will most probably shift. Dun like others to probe into unwanted ideas ignited by wad's written here, + i dun own them, neither do i even have the intention. It is seriously a headache. Misunderstanding makes even the brightests havens look dark n dull.
But afterall, i believe in karma. "happily, ever, after"
Enchanted roX.
LaBellaVita Revived.

Kinship,Friendship,Love-
a fool's lost to a potential win.

2007-10-07T21:44:00.000+08:00

What a headache..
Aspire's in a mess..
So is everything

+.+
Jiu shi jiu shi jiu shi jer yang~~
YaWnxz.

Brahms Concerto no.1 in D minor.
Juz felt everything is not in order.
Makes me pointless to speak either....

2007-10-05T21:45:00.000+08:00

Respect.
Leaders earn their respect.
On top of that, before 1 even tries to lead, 1 muz learn to follow.

Tolerance no longer comes from juz the word alone,
but involves a more open minded heart..
& a need to resolve all "crudity"

What that looks like it, is not it sometimes.
How do we even know??
But exactly do we have guage of what's really right & wrong?

To really tink that fighting is necessary in eyes of some..
While others consider it a waste of time..
What is it that you really can get out of fighting?

It appears that i have been faced with another task..
that has been really really really really really a big headache. Faced with strong competition that i've never yet before, certainly, it seems like, my bestie all achieve great marks.
Ding Jie, my triple science friend is now in NJC.
While i'm somewhere around the bottom, wonders if it's the same case now =p
I'd end up in SMU, which i dun mind.

All of your sorrow, grief & pain..
locked away in the forest of the night..
Your secret heart.. belongs to the world..
Of the things that sigh in the dark..
Of the things that cry in the dark...

- If we hold on .. together~ =)

2007-10-01T21:21:00.000+08:00

Once again.. I looked at the red marks n realised they were not pleasant looking.
Perhaps all the while, have all thus been in vain ?
Upon so many that dawned on me, then i realise.. it's not de marks.
It's something else.

Somehow, maybe it's juz what Ms Sim's words affected me.
Why is it that she has to said such a realistic sentence?
Made me realise, all the effort, work seems to be in vain.
Yet who pays attention to those who fought so hard, to be rewarded with nothing & in vain.

But having braved all the storms and fights..
It seems like the greatest test would be upon us.
Yet it is not the most likely the best results..
but all must not forget..

Of the greatest wars fought in history,
How much blood & sweat has been spill.
How much pain & suffereing has been paid,
Juz to get it done.

I realise it might not win it either.
Yet, it is a battle, whereby honour lies with not the greatest thing,
but upon a small little matter that rest within everyone.
Ourselves.

To fight against others seems simple,
but to put oneself under immerse pressure..
to overcome & undergo one's limits
To make the final outcome clear.

In de eyes of law lies no emotion.
Fa bu ker yuan,
Qin you ker yuan
zZz.. Let me then focus.

Let them come.
Seems like once this major war is over..
There might be more to come..
But then it'll be less tiring.

2007-07-23T22:24:00.001+08:00

Try tis, if u tink level I n II are no kick
http://www.truefriendtest.com/friendtest/773290

2007-07-19T22:59:00.000+08:00

As promised,
Wen hui.. see if u can break it ?

Level 1
http://www.truefriendtest.com/friendtest/752740

Level 2
http://www.truefriendtest.com/friendtest/752906

Kinda crap. =X
LoLs. But well, fer de fun of it.

Meanwhile, those of us that didn't do v. well for mid years, blame de school.
" SRJC all 4 U "
Get it ?
Hahahax... jk ok!? Some smart alect told me about it tis morning n i was like =.-
Anyways, dun b supersitous over tis kinda rubbish stuff. Hahahax,
get a good laugh n we'r on for the prolonged battle of A's again..

Come on ppl, dun get discouraged.
Nights may be long now, days may be a dread..
But it's like that.
=) Perservere on !

Wan an~

2007-07-02T23:02:00.000+08:00

I'm quite all right.
I guess everything shd be fine.
you are more of my concern

It was great
Everything was fine.
I juz can't forgive me for everything u had suffered.

YO ho. Yo ho~

Yo, ho, haul together,hoist the Colors high.
Heave ho,thieves and beggars,never shall we die.
The king and his men
stole the queen from her bed
and bound her in her Bones.
The seas be oursand by the powers
where we will we’ll roam.

Yo, ho, haul together,hoist the Colors high.
Heave ho, thieves and beggars,never shall we die.
Some men have died
and some are alive
and others sail on the sea–
with the keys to the cage…and the Devil to pay
we lay to Fiddler’s Green!

The bell has been raised
from it’s watery grave…
Do you hear it’s sepulchral tone?
We are a call to all,pay head the squal
land turn your sail toward home!

Yo, ho, haul together,hoist the Colors high…
Heave ho, thieves and beggars,
never shall we die.

Never.. shall i die.
Vampires dun die.
They perish.

Maybe the sun light vanquish n go.
Let the bright moon light shine.
Night has fallen..

Good luck for mid years all !

2007-07-01T14:53:00.000+08:00

I haven't shed a drop of tear.. since pirates III.
I haven't cried.. since madame Zenia gave me tat blow.
N tat very night, de following morning, they gave way..

Sweeping the broken pieces into a cold metal chest..
It's time for full form ?
I no longer breathe warmth in the air..
No breeze in the winds..
No taste in the food..
Both my appetite and senses are dying out..
N i couldn't sleep that night..

i'm turning so in human =X.. hais.
My worst nightmare is now true.
You know, i dreamed one day you had an accident..
waters were already at my eye when i woke up.
it was so horrible~

Now, u look like that to me.
Either way, it ached so much that i could not bear it any more.
I couldn't hold anything back.. why?

Dun depise urself, it's not your fault.
It's all mine..
If i haven't appeared, everything wouldn't have even happened.

You, will lead a happier life than now then.
I'm sorry for all de trouble that i've given ya.
De pain, sms bills, everything..

I'm so sorry..
I'm so affected by Davy Jone's musical locker..
we seem to b in de same plight..

It aches greatly.
Hands you some ice* you will need them more than me.
I know, i can only pray ur's stop hurting.

Pls, dun cry..
I didn't mean to.
I will know it, becoz urs are linked to mine.

=')
Many fangs.
Good Luck for Middy Years all.

2007-06-24T09:36:00.000+08:00

Up is Down

Davy Jones

Big Vs Bigger

Will you marry me ?

Some of the SS that was taken from the movie. LoLs, bet everyone watched it ler. Nice !! Alongside F4 Rise Of the Silver Surfer.

Though it was rather sad. Master Will turner will only see Ms Elizaberth Swan after every 10 years ? Hhhmm.. juz for 1 day..

It's such a long wait..

LoLs.. Holidays are turning into normal days.

People in JCs are not enjoying, maybe they are. Coz we're treasuring every bit and pieces of time we have juz before we fully engage A levels in full.

Sounds rather noble.. but well, it's gonna be tough.

To my many pals, juniors, friends, brothers and buddies in JCs..

It indeed is tough, but let's not give up now. =)

Let daylight shine upon strong faith and hope admist the dim nightsky.

Brightening and opening a bright and brand new day !

Juz went to Mr Er's Concert last nite. It was very nice. The piece they played were very touching. Becoz simply Mr Er brought out the piece's feelings. Though maybe they worked very hard n are very tired, it was a great concert !!

Could feel the piece's impact. =P We sat abit too front, when they FF, my ears were taking a full hit. =X Hahax.. but it was such a big band that i dreamed of as well..

New Town Alumni~ My graduated Seniors, juniors blah blahs. Me, Cassandra, Yi Ci & Mitchell is going back this Friday 29 June 2007. For those reading this and wish to go back, ring me or sms me. I believe you have my no. If not, contact any of those above.

Much changes has happened to the school, but i juz hope if u wanna go back you have someone to pei you or it looks weird! hahax.

That's all for now.

Let the exams come.

Let them come.

We will fight and they will die.

2007-06-21T06:53:00.001+08:00

Seems like everyone's mugging hard for mid years.

So Much to study ! So much to do~ So little time..

Sounds like Kingdom hearts LoLs.

I couldn't sleep the whole night. I dun wana bluff you de.. i try to hold..
But it seems like i couldn't hold back whatever tat was happening within me.

Maybe the whole band was going with me, it wasn't so bad.. yet ur absence mean so much to me.
Somehow it was rather loss but warmth to know they're there..
I juz dunno why i reacted like that..
I've been such a stupid boy =X

Maybe i'm juz selling fish~
Dunno when will i see you again once exams starts =X hais..
Juz before all hell break lose..

Hais..
Daylight seemed like eternity without you.

2 Weeks later, is 7 of July. The Seventh Night Of July.

Juz wonder could i see you again that very night ? It would be such a nice night~

On top of that, this very year of 2007. 07/ 07 / 07.

I know i can't let it out...

It's juz my inner conflict. It's that poison.. =X

Vampiry SouL/ Anglic Heart-

I guess some stuff i gotta be brave n do it alone..

Though.. it's me suffering from eternity's curse.

2007-06-11T22:13:00.000+08:00

Aye maties.
Been a long time since i was here.
1stly, de sun has been taking a toll on me. =X
I've seemed to turn more sleepier in de sun recently, the weather is indeed killing.

Nextly, those who seek to find the graveyard shall no longer find it. Graveyards belong only to ghouls, not vampires. Perharps finding the correct word shall unlock it, but why bother finding a place where the living dreads ?

For those who dun understand what's that, that's nothing. Becoz no matter how much ppl try to read into things, they still get it wrong. But what that reeks between juz a matter of life & death lies within our will to forgive n forget, on top of that, our harmony and what we've sought for so long.. peace.

The days that come have yet to be harder, but they've indeed proved their toughness. 2 weeks of extra lessons pushed the fact that things this year are going to be more dangerous and freaky. Hahax, to what extend? To a large majority, it proved to be totally hazardous. For some, it was pretty great. well, what can i say? STUDY HARD LO !

2S13 Princesses n Knights, Kings & Queens, Emperor n ??? : Let us jia you and be famed the 1st class honours to host de 1st in school scholar ! =) So jia you huh everyone !

Mei: Sorry becoz all this while, i've been much of a burden to you. I'm appreciative of all your help given to me all this while, but some things gotta be done by myself. =) Xie Xie ni. I've imposed on you too long ler, it's time for me siam =P
i still tink tis way, maybe you tink i dunno anything, but i'd say what do you know of me? You tink i nv experienced it before ? well, all i can say is.. urself. Still de same, dun let ytd drag today down. Then can you move on. Your shi jie will do their best to help you. I know she will, not only juz her, jing wen & so on.
I know i know, sometimes we tend to be emo abit, but after all, so long ler, you feel something different. Nothing has changed mei, =) you are still de strong gal i know of ytd, today and tomorrow. For my brotherhood ring is with you. That's all i can help of you now. take care.

...: Ya~ all i can say is.. take good care of yourself, all de best for ur diploma ? I know it might be abit late if you've taken it, but the results shdn't be out yet rite ? =X If it haven't, you have my blessings. If not, i certainly hope you've done your best =). i'm fine, you muz try ur best and work hard for this 1n 1/2 more years. that's all i have for ya.. wif my limited memories.

The ice in my heart has finally settled. The mirrorish shards of ice warns me of the wrong incantations and wrong foretells. Meanwhile, warmth is vanishing.. I feel that reality has made it such.. for juz this while =.= To be like a no life person. Rawr~..
Yet i was the one who placed the ice in..
I m such a paradoxy personel. to be or not to be~ lOls.

I'm fine on the overall. How not fine can i be ?
Take care everyone =)
Dj, hopes ur brother recovers.
Miracles do happen in tis world.. you muz believe it..
I'm sure your brother would appreciate it one day, and you would too. =)

2007-05-28T23:30:00.000+08:00

In the dead silent of the night~
Where i lie forgotten~
The night is still young.. no more..

April falls into the month of May, n the May winds blows it into June~ soon to be realised.
The SYF trimphs were great.. i enjoyed it very much.
But the concert was juz as fine only. Maybe cause the dampening of the results of my CT did it.
Hais.. but i thank you very much for everything all the while.
Ur smiles make me feel very different, make me feel radience once more.

Juz afraid one day i might hurt you =X
You are juz too good ler..

GP paper's over.
Band's next committe is coming.
Cassan's de next JJC president !
Seems like JJC was fated to be my allies. LoLs.. first zaewe, then cassan.
My gosh.. seems like my good old contacts are holding posts which they have made huge changes.
Thinking back, what else could i better possibily have done ?
But realising that JJC could contain more FuHua n perharps Mr Neo's/ Mr Er's schools, united under one common goal was much simplier ?
Well, i guess it's more of a challenge of uniting, but whatever it is, what i feel like washing off me, seems to bug me. Seems like there's always some business which i have to interfere in. Or maybe i'll truely wash them off when everything's really fine, or really dead then i'll juz hack everything. =X

Juz realise my skin was really old. JuZ dun feel like going to school tml that early. Tian ar.. zZz..
Nothing to blog.
Kayaking's taking a strain on me..
Guys, u shd know, my muscle strain.
it's affecting much of my activities. Hais.
It drove a headache too.
thanks for her concern all the while.

As time drives by, when will i ever catch a full glimpse of you again ?

if i were to give you a star, i would give you the whole galaxy..

3 years.
Time to change my blog layout. =X
i'm tired..
yawnXz.
No more aqurium dweller, n no more visitors for now.. this place has been a graveyard.
=X
Wan an ~

2007-04-22T00:05:00.000+08:00

Let X be the random variable " no of yrs to wait "
X ~ Po ( 3 )

Let wintery tears melt and pass..
Let those cruel and harsh winds pass..
N from there leaves me to know one thing..

whether the star of venus then shines on.. forever?
Let it be the my promise to you..
my worth of sincerity..

& hope it will overcome everything else =')
I know enough water has been spilled on this one.
but can't help it i guess..

I know i can't be there always..
Becoz we belong to different worlds..
Hell & heaven apart..

But know that i will catch you even if u fall from the highest heavens to my darkest hell..

wonder when can i catch a glimpse of you ever again ?

Let time unfold n let it catches you slowly..
Common test has juz passed.
Dun tink it's very good, dun tink it's very bad also. I wonder, what m i saying also ? Maybe i'm juz not in the mood. Lols, somehow it's de dunno what to say feeling.
It's not i dun wanna blog, somehow there's this time constraint lahs. When you juz feel like jotting down some things here, you start worrying "do i have another assignment not done ?" " did i left anything ?"
Stressed.
That's de abt time i admit tat fact.
To a certain extend stress is needed.
BUt well, my eyes are closing.
SLEEP.
REST WELL.
=')

2007-04-09T22:17:00.000+08:00

I had such a fantastic "good " friday.
Dun know whether it's suppose to b tat way.
Apparently, the good takes a turn n twist everything de other way round.

Haven't been blogging.
It might be a problem too..
I haven't got anything to say either.

Is a good deed enough to redeem a life time of evil deeds ?
Or, is one evil deed enough to claim de good deeds of a life time ?
Somehow it isn't like consider other's feelings..

Problem is.. are we caring too much abt our own to bother abt others ?
Let's put it like using Mdm anion today.
I may complain all i like abt her..
yet for those that made an effort to do..
is it really fair to them ?

i already say, i dun not dis regard other ppl's viewpoints.
No one owes me anything.
No hatred, no anger, nothing.. didn't i say long ago ?

Some things may have said out of a moment of rash ness, i apologise.
LiL turtle, maybe u were right. but in this world, being kind can give rise to misunderstandings.
i tink i'm caught in a serious one =X

Regardless of what, i'm dam tired..
I guess everyone is too.
How i wish i could sleep for a eternity..

She is still so farr away...
Whatever, my heart has already fallen into the dark shadows of the night..
Fading in the silence of the darkness..
Let nature takes it's course..

2007-03-25T01:40:00.000+08:00

Juz one view point and i'm a public enemy.
see how simple it is for me to start a fire.
hahax.

maybe we can all start wif " where is the problem ?"
if we didn't say.. it during VP talk
if we didn't have.. him
if we have .. him
all the if if if ..
are all "if" which are thots of mind.

i wonder how dangerous m i now ?
Maybe i'm very dangerous right juliana ? Hahax..

I got no comments about anything all the while.
Juz that, if thing's going quite fine all along for me..
i see no need to change ?
Quite fine becoz no life is forever peaceful..
there's changes..
Ok maybe i'm selfish lahs, well then, if u'r unhappy,
try n change it to ur situation then.
Eat desserts people,
i hope you know then..

Life goes on~..

Looks like i'm going to end up in a hospital soon.
LoLs..

2007-03-04T22:31:00.000+08:00

The last entry was.. a date to be remembered. Will be remembered, and cease to remembered soon. What use would it be anyways ?

Ju Hua Tai~

That's the song playing now as you read this entry.. this entry is on it..

If i'd say " once upon a time" ppl would tink i'm saying a fairy tale.
Becoz u all thot, all fairy tales start wif "once upon a time"
therefore a assumption is made.

Well, is there anything wrong wif it ?
I'd ask you.
Know what's stereo typing ?

Ms goh's house visit.
Somehow, half de class didn't make it and something happened.
I should say one one thing regarding it. Honour ur word.

Most of us can't do it at certain times,
but pls note, if u can't honour it.
Pls pay back wif full price can ? Dun like feel ashamed for it or wad lahs.

For you know, try taking a knife and stab a hole in a fruit.
Once you remove the knife,
u know u cannot recover the hole u stabbed.

For one that was responsible for what happened then..
after writing so much,
thats all i have to say abt you.

Everyone has a limit,
it's juz whether you know whether to stop or not when you'r told.
If u choose not to, then you gotta know de price.

I dun blame the poor guy for flaring up.
He sure knew how'd i felt somehow sometime back.
Leaders muz earn their respect - N a leader gotta know what's he/she's doing.

Somehow, i dun like relating things to the past.
I already say, let bygones be bygones.
Juz wonder how long fate takes to pay me some payment.

Aren't vampires suppose to be plain evil ?
LoLs, nope.
I'd say i dun like to curse, but i juz wished i got my payment back.
Wished- but best not to.
it's time to forget~
But, it's up to de devil now.
i dun call de shots.

Remb, it's not good to flare up something sealed in Ice. My flame is burning..slowly & deadly..

I maybe talking arabic again.
Draw and rip only at will, n forget much.
Or pay wif de price of death
Know ur limits..

nightZx.
I'm really sorry~

2007-02-25T12:59:00.000+08:00

Barely really had time to really come in and blog. I guess the rest of the people couldn't help agreeing more. Moreover, ppl's trying to guess out what's really happening here. >_< Dots. Nothing is between me and anyone else k ! Be it love, hate, like, wadever~.

zZz. Write simple english such as no one owes me a living you all start tinking otherwise. When did i ever mean something when i didn't say it out of my mouth ? Also, even if i did, can't i resolve things ? Do you like fighting every now and then ? zZz...

Firstly, Happy Birthday to shi yong. Sorry i can't make it to ur bd party. My apologies..

2ndly, To my Juniors and friends taking O's last year and waiting for posting, wish you all get into the school of ur choice.

Lastly, i will change blog skin ? maybe. LoLs, tis skin is rusting.

Whatever will come to pass and hide in the shadows..
It's only if you are willing to raise those from the shadows,
or let them fade in the sun..

Everyone muz jia you !
CT II, blah blahs blahs.. all the way !
Shoo de dog and welcome de zhu zhu.
Happy Glorious CHINESE NEW YEAR TO ALL !
Xin Siang Shi CHen !
Shen Ti Jian Kang !
WAN SHI RU YI AR !

Blood flows out of heart into the empty soul..
everything will cease to change..
I'll let ur happiness be handed to someoneelse. Du Bu Qi..

2007-02-12T00:24:00.000+08:00

Dolls are still dolls after all..
even if forced to move, they will move.
Even if they dun move when they forced to move, they will.

Juz glad my heart is liddat.
Fragments of my heart are pieced together.
You'll be pleased to know i'm back.. but..
The flu bug still remains as the sign that i'm still weak..

It's so contridicting.
I know i couldn't protect you wif everything else..
yet i can't leave you walking away from my sight..

Where angels fail to shine
Where morals fail to die..
Where vampires come to life.

Zaewe wrote J1's are leaving. I got to thank them, blah blah blahs. >_< His simple gesture made me touched.
I tink i shall write for my J1s too.
Despite the short interaction, ya and all the trouble of getting instruments here and there, i still tink you J1 roxs. Becoz it was the first time, much of the j2s were rather convinced of de band's strength. Thanks for ur stay in SR. I know i'll miss you all.
Espicially Randolph. Hahax, for u have brought much laughter and joy for the J2s, teaching me more about other things as well.
Brings me back to when J2s were tinking..
" Are you part of this band or is band part of you ?"
Simply means.. Do u regard urself as a SRJC band member and commit urself to that..
or SRSB, is juz a part of you only, and you totally dun really care.

Half the time, i know it's not easy being president. Neither do you wish to be in a small band. Yet under circumstances.. dun everything start from the very beginning ?
The battle for SYF has started long ago, but it's getting more intense now. Jia you. Do not give in.
Do not doubt. We will get there.
We after all, held a concert at de Esplanade before wif many of our band mates of other schools.
Go for it, band friends !

NightZ

2007-02-05T00:50:00.000+08:00

Sick..

Broken..

Hais..

Sleepy..

PKO

Wen hui..

Jia you..

Herbologist

Tired..

yo..

Heart..

Rest..

- Juz dunno whadda write. Can u roughly guess what i wanna say ?
Try linking, then it makes sense. if wen hui + jia you, then doesn't sleepy + ??

zZz. V. exhuasted.

Juz..

like

for

long

-decade..

a

sleeping

feel

-like a vampire. Wan An *

2007-01-31T17:18:00.000+08:00

You alone can make my song take flight...
Help me make the music of the night...

Close ur eyes for ur eyes will only tell the truth..
And the truth isn't what you wan to see....
Close ur eyes and let music set you free..
Only then, can you belong to me..

Phantom of the Opera : Music of the night.

Hahax, now that Grayson has suddenly brought back the Phantom movement, i've gone nuts abt it also. LoLs, after all .. going to watch it around march or may eh ?
I'm here becoz i dun feel like studying.
Maybe it's becoz of flu.
Surprisingly i'm still alive ( LOLS)
Well, i'm not that serious, but well.. u can see i used a pack of tissue for the whole econs paper. I tink my mood for writing was mostly affected by econs. While you see lotsa scribbling over people's paper, you can hardly see any from mine >_<
I tink it doesn't bode well, but well, keep my fingers crossed.

Good Luck for Chem n Phy tml.

When you find
that, onceagain,
you long
to take your heart back
and be free -

if youever find a moment,
spare a thought
for me

2007-01-29T19:47:00.000+08:00

Stared at the empty space..
Then realise..
staring is actually funny..

it's boring,
yet time consuming.
Isn't it a ironic ?

Jer yang de deng jer
deng jer..

2007-01-27T12:05:00.000+08:00

Anger..
On the surface it reminds me how it was portrayed.
Well, seems like on the surface it looks so different from what's really inside.
Can you see what's inside of tis bubble of frustration ?

>_< Meanwhile..
Saying sorry doesn't really help sometimes.
Now i kana de thing which i'm worse at.

Hais. Also, the posionous fumes of love has re settled in my body.
Though, it's rather fine, but
love truely is a posion we gladly take.

Tired~..
knowing i would lose even before i fight..
this is de first time i'm giving way..
>_X.. yong yuan de kan jer ni bei ren na chee..

Wo zhen de shi mei you yong ...

Dui, Bu.. Qi...

2007-01-23T21:23:00.000+08:00

You know no fear, but know it when it catches you.

JuZ like stars in the night fail to shine.
JuZ like that~
But it matters,
becoZ you light my night.

Some random thingy.
De first is a phrase that sounds rather familiar eh ?
Right..
you'll know of what i speak of when you know it.

Meanwhile, i officially declare i have no feud wif who so ever and so on.
When did i ever had a feud eh ?
Let bygones be bygones.
Shd my past be a hinderance to you..
tell me...

N.. So.
Pls dun anyhow any how. HOR.
Especially for you - know - who.
Ur Firm Dao Bi ler lahs.
LoLs.

2007-01-21T22:06:00.000+08:00

I looked at the class taggy n realise, i shdn't have spoken at all. >_<
Coz i juz gave my most rough comments.
Aww well, i'll juz be writing tis in respond to who ever that feels offended.

I, Andy Ng, Class 2S13 Of SRJC, Apologies, "Say Sorry/sowwey", Dui bu Qi (hhmm wad else ?) to who ever, who so ever, anybody, everybody, who body ( combine who n body - tink no more ) whom i have offended with past comments.

Oh well, back to the old times. Dunno how long ago ever since someone complained abt me. Well, it's good to know i'm in exsistence. LoLs. =X

Whenever u tink of an apple, tink of newton.
Since an apple dropped on newton's head,
F = ma ( force = mass of the apple )
Wad if it's a pear ?
F = mp ( force = mass of the pear = mezzo piano = louder than soft = mana pt )
Wad if it's a durian ?
F = nothing. ( try dropping a durian on ur head ! )

* The following equations are not approved by cambridge or any university or institute of learning and strictly not to be copied into any lecture notes.

A little joke by fan ming. The world is small. Everything looks like the same, but it's not, becoz it's LOOKS like the same. Well, dun confuse that k ? LoLs..

When the tough gets going, the going gets tough.

I should stop cursing and swearing people under my breath. It's so hard to smile and pretend nothing ever happened >_< . Anyways, i already tried my best to tahan.
But tat's why there's this emotion call " angry " for.
Bet no one seriously saw me get v. mad before eh ?
Better not get angry n spoil that image.

Meanwhile, reminds me. The world is round.
U know right ?
BecoZ it's round, it's round.
Aww, that's a cold joke =P
bet u peeps out there muz be stressed that's why u'r reading tis boring boring entry made by me.

A little touch of it's tension will bring it's destruction.
A little arch of it's pension will bring it's construction.

You decide which fate to hold..
but you forget, u have a debt to pay to..
& i hope, the debt is enough to pay.

I'm getting naughty these days =P
typing more nonsense than ever >_<
Well, at least it relieves the stress.

I know you dun wish to get hurt, but pls remove that from my heart first.

2007-01-14T00:24:00.000+08:00

AS time passes, we begin to realise.
time is getting lesser n lesser.
things are getting heavier n heavier.

At de same time, prices begin to go up.
It's not econs, neither m i quoting Mr Lum.
"great powers, come wif great responsibilites"

There will come a time where you realise it.
Is what you've paid, given, in full?
or are u juz discouting urself ??

As much as not everything in this world can be valued in white & black,
in money n cash,
do u even know how much is it to be paid ?

drive a nail into the wall,
then pull it out.
De wall's not hurt isn't it ?

Or did u even notice de black thingy left behind.. scar.
U may pay attention to big pictures..
but did you see de small details sometimes ?

Somehow, i dun understand. Ppl love to look at something else. Like give u a picture to look at, instead of looking at how interesting it is, you say de frame is very big. VERY MR BEANY. Thankyou.
Dots. Not only that, when i show a picture of chocolate melting in a very cold place, it makes sense isn't it for chocolate to melt in a cold place ? After all, ice melts. zZz. Totally, i juz dunno how you all really look at things.
As works n stuff gets tougher on the journey on, it looks pretty ridiculus n childish to be messing around wif wadever crap. I'm not de least amused these days, for i'm not in de mood for much jokes. Furthermore i do not wan any other passing comments or remarks about me if i have nothing to do wif it. you tink very fun izzit ? i can't be bothered. I'm not going to hesitate to lay 5 bucks on any @~$*^%`'s face who's out to get me.
Even if with reason, you tell me what's right n wat's wrong. But look at urself, what can you tell me if you urself are telling me stuff that you dun even do ?

Leaders earn their respect.

i emphasis again, who are you to LEAD if you dun even know wad's going on.
will you juz stick n live in that world or will you see de world ?

The above text are written in thoughts. Whether you understand or not, pls do not anyhow draw conclusions or claims. Not unless you wanna be cursed for quoting me, as you already have been warned upon entering here.

Lastly: Spare a dam bloody thot for others. For everyone that spares a thought for you, at the end of the day, if you have 20 friends, it'll be 20 thoughts.
It makes the world a better place to live in..

Also,everyone has a LIMIT.
If u dun understand, get it understood.

Juz dun understand..
why de chocolate melted in my icy realm..
n heard de glass crystal within it drop on to the ground..
shattering into a thousand pieces..

Wad's up next ? >_<
zZz

2007-01-03T21:11:00.000+08:00

Death note II.
Sometimes, i dunno if everything was right or wrong.
Maybe it's all a disillusion.

Shall not bring about too much hoo ha.
i got to ground more solid into my heart.
Andy no more, comes vammy.

Coz, too much emotions can evoke and cause weakness.
hais.
I wish to let you stay sometimes..
but can you promise me nv to break my heart ?
i know you can't.
i'll juz see how it fits.

even if i can't get you.
i will make sure u have happiness.
=) that's de last thing i can do for you.

THat's all.
i'm exhausted very much.
nightZ.

2006-12-20T21:32:00.000+08:00

Perharps of what i have missed out of all entries..

As worlds split, as words met our ears,
what we hope for shatters,
what we yearn for so long so dear is gone.
is that, the worst that has yet to come ?

SO many worlds, so many different places, so many styles..
we come from.
yet united under the same category.
Studies, Books & everything else might call for a change.

Sometimes i do wonder.. in tis place of learning..
Do ppl so randomly purse what they wish to as always.
Why is it that things like " eat together" becomes " let's separate so that we can faster eat n go"
Isn't it.. abit contridicting ?

We push around our faults n blames,
a hope for it to be picked up by someone.
Yet, the one who cleans it up won't feel good.
but, do you all even know who's been playing behind those scenes ?

Maybe, we all dun really know. why..
A simple smile brightens someone life.
Yet, is it that simple to come up wif tat " smile" always.

Clean up.
How many actually like to clean up?
Eventually, no one really ponders why de area is so clean after de event.
Or, is Jia Qing's voice gone for nothing at all or simply juz plain talking to de uncle ?

Well, wadever it is, we muz learn to appreciate and apprehend things.
Efforts paid are not seen by de naked eye.
It's not like some things are forseen, after all accidents do happen.
It's not nice to hear complains regards to ur planning even when u'r joking, becoz you'r not de one getting things together, wad do you know of other than juz saying n saying ?

Wat is a leader for ?
To lead, n you all as followers follow him/her becoz you believe in his/her lead or others.
if not wad for follow blindly ?
Why follow if you are not satisfied ?

Muz we be as stereo type as de past ?
such tat purple is gay..
Gals tat like purple are gays lahs.
Is it juz a label to quickly brush guys who like purple gays immediately ?

so aren't i right to say all gals shd love pink ?
or m i not ? lOls.

If purple was gay, where do royalty stands ?

"Purple may signify homosexuality (especially female homosexuality), like pink and lavender. "
( source from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Purple )

Does MAY sounds like wu yue ? no i dun tink so in this context.

In de heart of a lady so far away..
Lies in the Collegue of the North..
So dearly gone you have been..

Words i do not own. Neither could i put it that straightforward to you. We are humans, we know, we have emotions. It's not nice to be telling other things right in front of many others. But, there is always a way to let ppl notify their mistakes so that they'll know.
Some mistakes are beautiful, some are not. Though we do not ask for a perfect thingy, why is it we can't make it a better place to stay?

Somehow, it's up to us to change de way u wan things. However, things do not come our way. Becoz, nature has a course to take themselves.

Band Fest's great. De concert will be great. =D

Though.. in spite of all de difficulties, but, a big thankyou to everyone for their hardwork espiacelly DeBussy band, coz we RoX in AMENIAN DANCES PT 1. Hahax. =P

For those of you that miss de concert. juz 2 bad. You missed a good night of music and fun.

Is this blog dead ?
HHmm.. no actually. i juz got nothing to write down.

thots come in many forms, like questions that i nv know de ans.
or even questions i dun even know what i'm asking.
But are u reading what i'm tinking ? LoLs.

2006-11-24T06:23:00.000+08:00

full name: Andy Ng Wei Hao
backwards: oaH ieW gN ydnA
were you named after someone?: no.obviously not. Maybe my father wasn't original but tat's not me.
meaning of your name: For the future, good ? ><
nickname/screen name: Vammie
Nick: Vampire
Screen name: Despairity Angel
birthday: 10 Sept 1989
place of birth: KK
nationality: Singaporean
current location: Singapore
star sign: Virgo
religion: free-thinker
height/weight: 178 / 50
shoe size: 8?9?dunno.
hair colour: black
face inherited from: MuMMy !!
.iinie or outie: outie?
lefty or righty: righty.
gender: Male
bestfriends/trust most: Xin, SSM, Jimmy,Stella, Clement, ZaeX, Dj.. ( n de list goes on)
guy friends: Xin, SSM, Jimmy, Clement, ZaeX, Dj.. ( n de list goes on )
greatest buddies: look at above
bf or gf?: for me to know and for you to find out.
crush: answer above.
parents: Mummy
worst enemy: myself
bestest online guy/girl: Potato, Min, My guild !
greatest advicer: sadly, no one maybe kay yoke
crying partner: no idea. Liu Xue Bu Liu Lei
any sisters/brothers: Mei
any pets: bo.
any disease: Bo.
pagers: bo.
telephone: for me to know and for u to find out
cellphone: 9xxO xxOO
pool or hot?: si mi lah leh ?
a car: bo lahs.
driving: i will want to learn to.
own room: yeah.
schools: ZPS NTSS SRJC
colour: PuRpLe/ Violet
relationship with parents: Still fine - one having war, one heaven
believe in yourself: yes.
love at first sight: ya
listening ears: dunno
get along with parents: with lao bu:Heaven /lao bei:
Warprayers/pray: free thinker lah
believe in reincarnation: yes
a teaser? : WEN HUI.
loves hanging on the phone: bo
getting married? : of course
loves driving: would love to.
motion sickness: Yes, if i'm not in the mood.
eat stem of brocolli: huh???RANDOM!
eat chicken with fork: im not barbarian lah.if you eat kfc as if they spon forks for you lah.
dream in colour: ???
type your fingers on home role: ???
sleep with stuffed animals? : yes.
person who sleeps next to you: my pooh !
on the walls of your room: white lah.
On your mousepad: a foolscape paper hard board
dream car: MiNi
dream date: somewhere....
honeymoon spot: Bo tink of it.
dream husband/wife: wadda.. huh ?
under your bed: i bo bed lahs.
single most important qns: i dunch know
bad time of the day: Morning.
worst fear: Nothing, maybe dolls ><
theme songs: Memories by within temptation
hardest thing about growing up: letting go of the past.
Funniest/scariest experience: too many to name.
silliest experience: dunno.cant rmb
worst feeling: hatred.
greatest feeling: love.
list 5 people whom u want them do to this survey:
1) wen Hui
2) WenX
3) HuiLin
4)Jia QIN ( Do on the 13th Empire blog)
5) Joan

Haven't been back fer a long long time. Why ? Busy busy busy. DunCh know wadda still awaits.

Perharps there are things meant to be brushed away quickly as i pace on this period. Hais...

the earth can nv become one with a undead ? ><

2006-11-16T23:21:00.000+08:00

Write a day's event wif this song. Hahax, SOmehow de words juz flowed in.

VERY Bad Day by me =P edited wif me imagination.

Where is the moment
I needed the most
You kick up a fuss
and the peace is lost

You tell me what is bloody main problem
you tell me my ez link gone away
And I don't need no carryin' on

You sit in the seat just to drive a sbs bus
You're faking a smile with the coffee you go
You tell me my card been way off line
You're falling to pieces every time
And I don't tink i have a problem there ~

Because I had a Fcuking bad day
i taking one down
i'm singing tis song just to turn it around
I say i really don't know
i say i don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
I had a fcuking bad day
The people don't lie
i coming back down and you really don't mind
i had a fcuking bad day
I had a REALLY bad day

Will you need a lousy ez link card?
The point is they laugh at what i say
And I don't need no carryin' on

i had a fcuking bad day
You're taking me down
i'm singing tis song just to turn it around
I say i really don't know
i say i don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
I had a fcuking bad day
The people don't lie
i coming back down and you really don't mind
i had a fcuking bad day
I had a REALLY bad day

(Oooh.. a holiday..)
Sometimes the system goes on the blink
And the whole thing turns out wrong
You need not take it back and you know
That you could be wrong oh that strong
And I'm not wrong(yeah...)

Where is the moment
I needed the most

Oh you and I
You kick up a fuss and the peace is lost

i had a fcuking bad day
You're taking me down
i'm singing tis song just to turn it around
I say i really don't knowi say i don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
I had a fcuking bad day
The people don't lie
i coming back down and you really don't mind
i had a fcuking bad day
I had a REALLY bad day

STUPID @SS driver coop my Ez Link. I've nv been so pai seh in my life. I Shd have stuff my fist into this FCUKING FACE MAN. MY Ez LINK GOT NO FCUKING PROBLEM LAHS. I SO FEEL LIKE BASHING HIM UP ON THE SPOT. FCUKING @SSHOLE...

yet i didn't know wad to do. I feel so lost. I feel so disappointed.
FCUK TIS THING.
i'm going nuts. ><

War.. at my place.
Cold war already my dad.
Mum's complaining over i sleep too late.
Crap. Like i wan to sleep tat late.

i'm scared. I dunno if i'll lose them over nite.
like now.
losing quite a lot of things slowly...
hais. hais.. haiss..
i'm losing everything i tink.
my gal, my sleep, my drms, everything slowly.
is this a nightmare?

can u wake me up?
Dad/mum going fer holiday to hk,
my ez link's been confiscated.
though i've been given another card,
it looks like my freedom's been compromised.

><
devasted n isolated.
disappointed and feeling low.

De 7th night of july

The star festival (Tanabata) takes place on July 7. On this day two stars (Altair and Vega) that are usually separated from each other by the milky way, come together. In the night of July 7, people put little bamboo trees in their garden. They also hang papers with wishes written on it on that tree in the hope they become true. Tanabata, also known as the "star festival", takes place on the 7th day of the 7th month of the year, when, according to a Chinese legend, the two stars Altair and Vega, which are usually separated from each other by the milky way, are able to meet.Because the 7th month of the year roughly coincides with August rather than July according to the formerly used lunar calendar, Tanabata is still celebrated on August 7th in some regions of Japan, while it is celebrated on July 7th in other regions.

With the year 1873, the Gregorian calendar was introduced to Japan. While the Christian way of numbering years is commonly used in Japan today, a parallel numbering system for years according to the reigns of current emperors is also frequently applied (see year converter above). The year 2000, for example, which happened to be the 12th year of reign of the emperor whose posthumous name is Heisei, was called "Heisei 12".

One popular Tanabata custom is to write one's wishes on a piece of paper, and hang that piece of paper on a specially erected bamboo tree, in the hope that the wishes become true.Colorful Tanabata festivals are held across Japan in early July and August. Among the biggest and most famous ones are the Tanabata Festivals of Sendai in August and Hiratsuka near Tokyo in JulyAs many other Japanese traditions, Tanabata has its origin in a Chinese tradition but has become distinctively Japanese over the centuries.

On the day before Tanabata,the Japanese express best wishes by writing on a piece of colored paper and tying it to the branches of bamboo trees found in front of the house. It is believed that prayers uttered and hanged on bamboo trees on the evening of Tanabata will be granted. It appears, however, that today's society feels less inclined to celebrate this celestial event. Yet, for some the belief is as clearly evident today as it was decades past.

Taken from (http://www.rumela.com/events/tanabata_index.htm)

7th nights of july.
Is love really a tragdy ?
Where by the nu lang will only met weaver at tis time ? (Altair and Vega star)
hAis.

Juz get me some peace pls,
n stop those painful pieces of memories from hurting.

Memories by Within Temptation
In this world you tried
Not leaving me alone behind.
There's no other way.
I prayed to the gods let him stay.
The memories ease the pain inside,
Now I know why.

All of my memories keep you near.
In silent moments imagine you here.
All of my memories keep you near.
Your silent whispers, silent tears.

Made me promise I'd try
To find my way back in this life.
I hope there is a way
To give me a sign you're ok.
Reminds me again it's worth it all
So I can go on.

All of my memories keep you near.
In silent moments imagine you here.
All of my memories keep you near.
Your silent whispers, silent tears.

Together in all these memories
I see your smile.
All the memories I hold dear.
Darling, you know I will love you
Until the end of time.

All of my memories keep you near.
In silent moments imagine you here.
All of my memories keep you near.
Your silent whispers, silent tears.

All of my memories...

Nightz. Got stupid school tml.
I tink i won't have much peace yet.
zZz.

2006-11-14T00:51:00.000+08:00

Looked at clock o_O, sees it as . 12 + !! AM !!
TML GOT SCHOOl. O_O ! O_O !! O_O !!!

Alice is coming fer my life soon. Alice iN WONDERLAND.
i juz wished to close my eyes n sleep for eternity
n wake up where the stars are far behind me..
where troubles melt like lemon drops N..
high above the chimmy top that's where
you'll... find... me....

Somewhere..... over the rainbow...
blue... birds.. fly...
birds.. fly .. over the rainbow...
Oh... why... juzz... can't... I.....

Oops, that was from "Over the rainbow" ><
Somehow, lyrics are what i wanted to say. same same lahs.

Dunno what's wrong wif me.
Tink i venus sick.
how to cure tis kind of ?

><
>< !
>< "

Tink go sleep better.
Ya..
tink it will help.

pardon me if i snapped at ya recently
or even dao you.
i abit gong now.
Juz like de whole sky fell on my head liddat
To eat is a bliss.
I miss you.
badly, very very badly.
yet no words speak if i saw you.
whyyy......
liddis again....
=) nightX.

2006-11-07T20:08:00.000+08:00

I stared at this blank screen again.
Is it me or what?
Maybe it is me, tml's OP.

N?
I kana a sore throat.
LoLs, not the first time fate delievers something "nice".

Dun look at me and say i've got insufficient rest.
In fact i slept from 1+ am to 12 pm at least.
N drink water as well.

Not been eating lots of rubbish.
><
Aww well, juz in short, not supposed to fall sick.

zZz.
Feeling stupid as well.
How how how in the world.. did it happened ??

Maybe hatred does make me a dangerous enemy.
or rather,
anyone.

Dunno lahs.
Maybe it was right to hate,
if not, tell me i'm not a human.

Humans have feelings ok?
Though i'm a vampire, no difference. LoLs.
hate or not..

I've decided to forgive again.
After all, i make bitter enemies.
It's true.

Budden, better to die better.
Hard to believe me that i got enemies eh?
zZzz..

What you see is not what you tink.
What you tink may not be what u see.
So..

What you see may not be what i tink.
What you tink is not what i see too.
hhmm..

So.. be more open minded.
And leave the worries n sayings to the wind,
Let de sea waves drown de cries of sorrow..

i'm not holding back anything.
De battle for A's has juz begin.
OP OP OP !

Jia You FOR OP, FRIENDS.
SENIORS JIA YOU FOR A"s
JUNIORS JIA YOU FOR O"S

2006-11-05T12:52:00.000+08:00

De Empire's video upload refuses to budge.
zZz...
Meanwhile, abit of haze covered my nice looking sky..

It's more than enough to bring dazes into my life
as i stared into the empty sky.
Clouds.. Stars, so near yet so far.

Everyone enjoys childhood.
so i guess, neverless, sometimes
we'r young at heart.

N, it nv doesn't hurt to be a child for once.
Glad u guys enjoyed playing wif fire sparkles that night.
That also proves something, a wrong delusion.

Many of us, believed that de JC 1 bash is a total waste of time.
As much as Piggy chia said, " it's gonna be interesting"
let me put it in another sense.

It's an event, whereby it's like a graduation.
Many of u will start " still got 1 year, graduate what ?"
HoWeVeR.. nv forget, there are those who count this as graduation.

Those that are not staying.
Those that are not going on the next part with us.
Will you spare this chance for them for one last memorable event ?

For the next batch, it'll also work well.
Let us not be selfish as this we'r de pioneer batch, a failure now might prove a obsticle for future batchs to come.
Maybe, JC 1 bash was presented in a wrong way.

There's this saying " do things at the right time, right place and right way"
><
Well, i'd say, 13th Empire. let's go Forth tis bash !!

Let us keep a open minded.
I do not wish to see my fore sight prove wrong.
We R. One EmpiRe. One 13th EmpiRe.
A vampirary sight might not be true, but this is really true..

13th Empire, Submit ur survey that u recieved from the Emperor.
Juniors, Good luck For O's
Seniors, Good Luck for A's

-NCO Band Passing out parade this friday. Anyone wan go ? Sms me. =D

2006-11-04T00:17:00.000+08:00

I realise.
A part of me broke.
it collaspe juz ytd.

I was hit once more
not at de same spot
but juz de same area.

I dunno what's wrong wif me.
><
xin bu zhai ian.

i Tink i seriously nidda break from things.
As much as i wish to wash my hands off things,
things aren't happening.

Nvm, i'll juz let go.
Let go of everything i hold.
N watch them shatter right infront of my eyes.

After all, it juz did.
It juz shattered right through.
i was juz being stupid again.

hais.
hais..
haiss...

Forced to give up maple.
then lost her.
I tink, let's juz stop time for a little while.

So much to do,
yet so little time.

A vampire's misery ><

2006-11-01T12:53:00.000+08:00

How old do u act?
[x] i know how to make a pot of coffee
[ ] i can do my own laundry
[ ] i can cook for myself
[x] i do my chores after being told once
[x] i sometimes do my homework
[x] i actually enjoy intellectual conversations
[ ] i think politics are exciting
[ ] my parents and grand-parents have better things to say than my peers
total: 4

[x] i show for school/work everyday unless i'm sick
[ ] i always carry a pen in my pocket/purse
[x] watch talk shows
[x] i know what is incredibility without looking it up
[x] i drink black coffee
total: 4

[x] i know how to run the dish washer/ do the dishes
[x] i can count in more than one language
[ ] i can mow the lawn
[ ] i can wash the car
[x] i can make adults laugh without being stupid
[ ] i remember to water my plants
[x] i study when i have to
[x] i pay attention at school/work
[ ] i remember to feed my pets
[x] i'm generally organised
total: 6

[x] i can spell experience without looking it up
[x] i clean up my own messes
[ ] the first thing i do when i wake up is get coffee
[x] i can go to the store without getting something i don't need
[x] i understand jokes the first time they are said
[x] can type quickly, because i type everyday
total: 5

[x] my choice in clothing is acceptable in an office or something like that
[x] i can watch politics and laugh
[ ] i have realised the weather forecast changes every hour
[ ] i have realised that no one takes you seriously unless you are over the age of 25 and has a job[x] i can read a book and actually finish it
[x] people have said i looked older than i am
total: 4
add up to see how old u act..
i act 23 yrs old!

to tag five ppl ( my revenge!)
1. .
2. ..
3. ...
4. ....
5. .....

THxs to WenX i'm here to complete this entry. Well, quite some have happened, i've been wishy washy to decide a lot of things. Anyways, take care ,
JUNIORS GOOD LUCK FOR O"S !!
SENIORS GOOD LUCK FOR A"S !!
=D

2006-10-27T12:01:00.000+08:00

AS much i loved to type something else. Tis comes first. Wen Hui's good plot.
Tag five people at their tagboard after doing.
1. Will you tell your crush that you like him or her?
Ans: Maybe ? maybe not.
2. If your crush like somebody else, what will you do?
Ans: Guard her. Maybe forget her eventually if it's really hopeless.
3. You have accidently bumped into your crush and his or her friends. He or she invited you to join them. what exactlywould you tell him or her?
Ans: See how.
4. Prom is just around the corner. Your crush wants you to be his/her date. Now, do you think he/she likes you?
Ans: I dun tink so. How can it be a crush then ? LoLs.
5. What will you do if your crush said "I love you" to you?
Ans: Consider. Is there really such a wonderful scenario ?
6. Who is your crush?
Ans: Good Question- if u wanna know, come ask me. I maybe telling u~ hahax.
7. Do you think your crush like you too?
Ans: do you think you asked something right ?
8. Why do you like your crush?
Ans: Like means like lo. =X LoLs, not saying why.
9. Do you share any interests with your crush?
Ans: Yes. We live in Singapore, breathe and is known as Humans. ALOT lahs.
10. Will you ever going to marry your crush?
Ans: If She allows me to.

NOW, A WORD FOR A WORD.
1. Having feelings for myself
Ans: ok-a trapped emo soul in a cold person.
2. Loving someone is tiring.
Ans: Nope, it is nv tiring.
3. Breaking up is freedom
Ans: if there is no more meaning for it.
4. Going on a date is a waste money
Ans: Not when u enjoy the date.
5. Long walk on the beach is boring.
Ans: Nope, i juz love to see your beautiful face in the moonlight.
6. Saying "I love you" is lame
Ans: it is nv lame, coz it's only 3 magic words that can only be said to one person only.
7. Making out is so gross
Ans: Si Mi lah eh ?
8. Prom sucks
Ans: Nope, you get to see everyone in their best suits.
9. Your boyfriend/girlfriend is someone
Ans: Even she was an ordinary common girl, she is someone to me.
AND THE QUESTIONS.
1. Knowing the painful truth or hearing the beautiful lie?
Ans:i want the truth
2. Pretty but mean or ugly but nice?
Ans:ugly but nice.. There is a price for beauty n i can't stand meanies.
3. Group date or One-on-one date?
Ans: i dun mind, as long as shes comfortable with it.
4. Dating someone or staying alone?(Imagine your boyfriend/girlfriend is away for a few years)
Ans: Most prob i will wait. I'm juz worried she won't return or return with someone else.
5. Great body or great mind?
Ans: Great mind. Body ? Technology advance ler, go plastic surgery.
6. It's Saturday; Going out with your bf/gf or your friends?
Ans: Anything, Gf is she prefers a quiet date.
7. Follow your heart or your mind?
Ans: Heart.
8. You did a lot of bad things in the past; Confess or hide?
Ans: Confess
9. Your perfect date?
Ans: Anywhere as long as we enjoy ourself v. much.
10. The way you say good bye after you went on a date.
Ans: Look into her eyes. but seriously, will there ever be a chance ? if ya then say lors.

1) First One
2) Runner-up One
3) Middle One
4) Fourth One
5) Last One

2006-10-25T23:02:00.000+08:00

Wells. It's a relief to know.
I PROMOTED.
But i'm dam tired now to tink of anything.

Wrote like many many many. Like 2 pages full of pp de no of testimonials.
Brain freeze now. Also abit emo.
Dota skills like sh!t liddat. ><

was scolding more harshly than i usually does to nite while playing dota.
guess i was abit too much.
sorry..

That's all ? i guess.
Not feeling too well spiritually.
Juz, something in my glass heart breaks.

De oracle failed.
I guess let retribution takes it place at the correct time.
Looking n looking at glaring till my eyes drop.

zZz.. blog under construction still.
Some webby are still unavailable to help spice up this place.
for now.

REST.
The gal is responsible for my phlight shall see no more.
I hope.

>.<
You got what my heart dwells.
is it juz a concident ?

2006-10-22T22:38:00.000+08:00

Looking back.
I dunno what to comment.
For. I dun even know what to write.

What a whirl..
What a swirl..
something in my minds disperse and fades..
Something in my minds connects and weaven together..
yet, i can't see clearly.

I remb, de ever changing image of a uniform and casual wear in a mirror.
it was in my dream.
But, it seems like i stopped myself.
de date before everything is back to normal..
is this wednesday.

It juz flows in my mind.
I also dunno how to express it out clearly.
Whether i'm happy or sad about it.

It, de future.
what it holds is so uncertain.
N i m uncertain now.

Watched DOA wif Jason, god sista n Terence. It was cool. Princess Kasumi RoX along with the purple clan. LoLs.

Press my heart and hear it says : "I miss you"

-Hope i'm not wrong about you.

waiting..fer..you.

=)

Gd niteX.

2006-10-17T23:22:00.000+08:00

Here i m once more.
To leave a whirling phrase.
to put a vision into memory.

I dun really know.
i dun really understand.
but till now, i guess it's no point understand n know.

it all lies with de results.
Tomorrow.
But tomorrow is juz de beginning.

Mingde, thx for ur faith.
Along wif many others.
I feel de wind blowing in my path

Yet a flame too burn in my path.
It is only whether de wind is feeding it,
or eliminating it.

Hard to tell.
hard to say.
it juz lies within a matter of hours.

i m reluctant to leave now.
for i have swore to stay on.
swore to be there.. for my sole purpose.

Tml's weather forecast : = Medium showers with overcast skies.
>.<
u'll understand, if u do understand

Maybe it's juz me. n me that's not willing to let go.
Let it be then.
Points in de direction of the flames.*
let de winds soar high n put them off.
Let de flames not hinder de path beyond.

Sakura.. sakura.. da da da~ da da~ da da da~~..

2006-10-16T00:05:00.000+08:00

Here i m.
Sitting down.
Staring at this weird looking box.

Tinking.
Looking.
Staring actually.

The white lay out of this screen page.
This flashing bar line.
Yet my fingers don't seem to be moving...

I dunno what to say again.
DE Class BBQ passed.
Truely, many have enjoyed it tremedously.

Yupps. i agreed.
Ms Tan's leaving.
N maybe i m too.

That's what's bothering me.
>.<
Or m i not ??

Juz worried bahs.
Tml will come.
Many will let go.

Water will fall,
Emotions may gather,
but those fallen can nv be recovered.

I dunno how to continue from here.
I guess shd i b back again.
Then i shall emphasis more on other issues.

Promos is such a big headache to me.
Sleepless nights, stress n my mood.
zZz, wondering.. is everything going even fine wif me ?

Maybe i shd have juz gone to a poly.
But, But.. But !
wif out coming here..

would SR leave something so significant in my heart ?
would it have helped in some ways ?
i dunno. Dunno whether i'm making sense or not.

Gd NiteX.

Tml's weather forecast : = Light showers with overcast skies.
>.<
u'll understand, if u do understand.

still missing you. one special day is coming fer you already.
i tink.. i have.. maybe.

Sakura.. Sakura.. Sakura..
Sounds like Asian Folk Rhapsody =X Lols !

2006-10-14T23:13:00.000+08:00

Perharps all of us started asking, why u haven't been blogging ??
Something's feeling so empty suddenly..
something's feeling downright missing..

Yet i have no idea what it is.
Till then i realise,
what is it that u'll take, or rather, treasure with you when you leave ?

Hais yo, even music is failing me.
My cramp fingers couldn't move as Mr chiu asked me to.
Dunno why i turn so noob back again. >.<

I dun even know what my promos are.
But a slight vision already runs in my head,
giving my farewells to everyone, with a stormy weather forecast.

Is that what de future lies ??
i dun even know if shd i juz put it down..
so that i'd remember it, n know that i've left ?

It's abit kinda funny. Somehow, i don't really know like how to go around putting in down in words either. It's like contridictary. I couldn't figure it myself either. =X Like, writing down something n cancelling it again.

Till i know what to put down, then i shall. Other than that, i'll be juz fine. Meanwhile, i cannot promise but i tink i shall wait for you- You'r one tough one, but i like you. As much as i hold back to wait, pray ur heart stays intact for me. =X

Winds Soar High Among the scattered trees
De fallen leaves whispering in a distance
ur sight in a distant is my light
For i know that i am right.

Will i be proven right ?
Let time tell.
Let my hectic shedule begins.

other than exams, studying wore is over.
It's PW n other stuff. zZz.
Tat's all i guess, still coping fine.

How i wished i'd see you again. Today juz missed it.

2006-10-07T09:21:00.000+08:00

FIrst of all. PROMOS IS OVER ! RAWR ~!

The long awaited moment has arrived.

Yet, something in me dissipates...

Why isn't there much joy suddenly.

it's perharps the though everyone is sorta habouring, abt retaining n stuff like that. All well, who isn't scared and hold the confidence to say I'm going to get promoted ? Cuzzie Sihui n everyone else's been " u sure get promoted". Hais. I wonder, what if...

Maybe i'm juz thinking too much. The nightmare of mid years are back to haunt me. Ppl is right. It's hard to get up once u've fallen. But i'll perserve, maybe one will never get back to where one was, but it might be better to walk another path.

After the promos, the thing directly is none other than.. her. It's been 3 yrs. I juz wonder how to go around doing it. Shd i bring flowers ? De guilt of being her mentor n not being there at de crucial moment haunts me as well. =X =X =X

Meanwhile, i juz dunno why. People juz have some weirdo thinking on their minds. If their minds were set to do it in the start, then SAY SO. It's so irresponsible to suddenly come to a "CONFIRM" situation.
It was asked so MANY MANY MANY times. Juz dun understand why some ppl are so ritarded. I M SCOLDING RETARDED NOW BECOZ I"M MAD. Not studying for tests, exams, yet hold such powerful rank over de previous trial ? are u implying that u'r worthless ?
Maybe worthless in the new environment. THEN wHat ARE U TRYING TO GET ACROSS? PISSED. I can't imagine you saying goodbye to the rest of us. BecoZ, u jolly well know what to do. So much for spending time. So much for everything. Turns out de ultimate traitor is...

you.

Maybe it is ur flaw as i always say n talk of. Inability to realise the hurt that you're causing to everyone else. Suan ler. This world is full of people like you. Lived through those days i already had. =X

One Failed move, One wrong leadership.
One presumed rightous turns out to be no 1 bad guy.
LoLs.

What is my world turning to ?

Freedom at last.
I dread you now.
For.. i know, you nv try to make me exsist.

Before everything gets hectic once more, ENJOY IT!
JunioRS, O's de, Jia you jia you! =D
P.S- HOw's de new skin ? I edited de. Post ur comments on de taggy !

The winner takes it all..
the loser stand to fall..
Beside the victory.. there's a destiny.

2006-10-01T21:00:00.000+08:00

I'm going down right under.
I have no idea why.
I m juZ like falling.. falling.. falling...

A huge shadow encompasses me.
Or rather gripped me.
"Will you, save ur soul ? Or Will you..."

Sounds like a nightmare.
Tink it was what happened ytd nite.
I couldn't sleep.

Was watching Bean, de ultimate disaster for inspiration ( we muz always watch lame movies to get some laugh ! ) after that watch god of gamblers 2, another aka lame show. then i begin to realise, the hardest thing now, is to force a laughter on one's face. Everyone's like so stressed up. Then maybe i'm too serious. Hahax, though i try to be as lame as possible to make ppl laughed. =X

Yet, UrsRoyalAdvisor seems to have fallen. My tittle is fading slowly. My exsistence in SR seems to be vanishing. I can sorta feel it. It's a drop in confidence level suddenly. Maybe it's becoZ i've juz woken from a slumber.. a slumber, that could have been prevented.

While i slept utterly peaceful, the whole world dreads.
Yet not very peaceful i slept,
& awoke with more troubles to settle.

Stress it is. Indeed.
i juZ wish to say.
Don't blame me if i can't make it.

BecoZ i have myself have to blame.
i tink..
i'm sorry.

Perharps.

It's stupid for me to be de emperor's left hand when i cannot even take care of myself.
Maybe, my shadow has risen.
Fallen my light has, to de darkest catabombs of Fear.

5 days to freedom

It will come swiftly..
Let them come.
Let them pass.

-I tink i'd be fine - to be.

2006-09-29T18:20:00.000+08:00

Hmm.. 2 papers have passed.
Kindly do not ignored this sign.
It's de sign of ur only navigation here.

*If there's anything u do not understand, kindly ask me personally* - Contents Copyrighted.All right reserved =X -

Hahax. BecOz, that's why de misc exsists.
If not, i tink there's no nid for misc eh ?
So then, i shall spill abit of feelings today here.

first-> It's rare that De Emperor pays a visit to my blog. Lols. Emperor = JQ = jia qing !. Well, i'd say de top rankings for this year have been borned - Elwin, Joan, Jia Qing, Poh Wun, Charis, Wen Hui. From what i see, the whole class been up alot of effort. Yenny, Ying Wei, Pei Wen, Stella, Jeremy, ah Gui, Ethel ... siew ming, if u'd ever consider us as ur class. =X No offense.

well.. i juz awoke from my slumber. I begin to realise there's much more things to do then to dream abt that gal. =X Maybe, i owe it to Wen Hui.
Let's get on to what i wanted to say last nite first :
-As written on my hp my thots-
~ My other alternatives suddenly open out, it was as if i've been enlightened. Mum would not really blame me for anything, it's dad that will cause the storm. As much as i try to steer away from him now, becoz i know the closer i get to him, it becomes much easier to hurt me, for we 2 do not share the common dream. So much for 2 snakes. It was predicted that 2 snakes would meant no peace. That is de disaster i'm trying to avert. I already say before, i do not wish to be their replicia of their dreams.
SR. It has nothing much to other jcs, except we got a one for all and all for one attitude. In a way or another, we are sorta united in a form. I begin to realise that, perharps everything in life we take for granted. It makes a difference in someone's life for something or maybe everything ...

Wen Hui, the "irritating" guy of the class, which he self pro claims so, after ytd, i dun really tink so. He said : " What is this ? So n so say leaving, this this that that, then what about me ? Have u left and left me behind? " Suddenly de guy whom i thot has no feeling one, opened up a strain of feelings and thoughts in me. Yeah, what abt him ? Suddenly i forgot that Jia Qing is a 100% promote to pei him, i juz realise those of us that say " si la, poly liao" actually are selfish. No offense.
" Qin Shang Ker Yuan, Fa Shang bu ker yuan"
In terms of emotions can be pardoned. But in terms of law it cannot be pardoned.
Quote from Mdm Yang ( Yang meh meh )- hahax. that's de good thing i carry around with me from her lessons. It means that that somethings are by right correct, but always becoz of emotions, it causes a by left ? =X
U may say i cannot promote liao, still worry abt what friendship, but have u sorta like consider if u'd worked hard to promote, are u fulfilling what friendship is abt ? Over coming the odds together ? have u tried to ask for help ?
But somehow, it is hard to say. Accidents do happen. zZz maybe i m juz emotional to know what i m talking abt =X

Yeah, it was rather touching to hear him say that. I was like " right, for one time, he is right". it was a warmth but sorrowful feeling, i also dunno how to descibe. Then i looked at him again. Yes, this is the wen hui that we know, we see each day. o_O suddenly he has become more emotional than i m.

Why do i say i owe u one ? Becoz maybe u evaluate what i said. i did say i didn't like it becoz of a various reasons. U remind me of the gal. But, thxs to you, i cleared up much faster than i thot. U used " poison Vs Poison " method. I was still hurt then, but more hurt made me counter the pains of both, neutralizing both, making me on form again. So, Wen Hui, thankyou, u helped me from my worst nightmare. Credits shd go to my buddies and pals to. Kay yoke, thxs, u have helped at a crucial time. winnie too,min, char, caryn, allison, lyn.. if i go naming it'll be a long list =P. Ok lahs, anyone who helped in a way or another.

i might think that my chances of winning this battle is abit at disadvantage, becoz my rear flanks were destroyed ( common tests). Making me vunerable for this battle of exams.. zZz

Ya, i tink that's all i wanna say. =X zZz.

7 more days to freedom.

i shd say 6, de day is almost over.

LabelleVita Roxs. =D

2006-09-28T06:05:00.000+08:00

Maple is down from 1935 till furthur notice. It was rather late. Lols, i signed in like at 10+ ? before getting kicked by the server. That was barely 5 mins to check out the new stuff. But nvm, promos first.
To complete hui zai's questionaire which i tink most prob he did it HIMSELF to keep his gossip.co updated. -__- hui zai = go zai dui that zai. LOLS.

1)Are u in love?
Can i be out ? =X no.
2)is the 1 u love in ur sch?
200% no.
3)is she/he in ur class?
300 % no.
4)whats the name?
SaxyPhone.sounds nice rite ?
5)whats the gender?
instrument. Erm, it's precious coz it's my baby.
6)whats the nationality?
japan, Yahama!
7)whats the religion?
i dun think it has one
8)with which female do u like spending time with in ur class?
Those who tink that it's worth to exchange their times wif me.
9)with which male do u like spending time with in ur class?
Those who tink that it's worth to exchange their times wif me.
10)do u hate some1 in ur class now?
Yes.
11)do u want him/her dead?
No. Is death a solution to all ?
12)do u need help to achieve 11?
101%/100% No.
13)which group of ppl in class do u hate now?
Huh ? Group ? When got group one ?
14)who is the most entertaining person in class?
Mr Ng ! =X Does he count ?
5)who is the most irritating persion in class now?
wenhui! hahax, ok ok, he changed. So no one savy ?
16)what do u wish the class to change?
Promotions everyone !
17)whose personality do u want the most in class?
What a way to ask de question. No oNe.
18)whose intelligence do u want the most in class?
No one, i'm had mine.
19)who do u think should get the student of the year in class?
De emperor Qing. Or His popular - Jeremy wif his fan clubs.
20)Evaluate ( u forgot to state : Wif regards to wat ? It can be to de survey for all u know !)
They are ppl of great talents and strengths. Savy ? do u need more detailed ? Lols.
The five lucky people:
1. Pent-ing
2. But-ing
3. Pro-ing
4. Eth-ing
5. Meth-ing

NO thing.
So much for questionaires eh. =X Lols. Wen Hui, we know what u did to it ! =P
Going for GP paper now.

As much as my image in my bathroom window seems to tell me when i put on my badge, it's de last time to use that.
I said yea, last time for this year. A new time begins the next when i put it on again. =X

Something crosses my mind. It's strange, maybe i'm juz paranoid. Something terrible seems to be happening soon. Terrible = loss of someone. Can't help feel a mild feeling of it in the air. Maybe becoz it's her anniversary. Hais..

Remb to bring sweaters, if u'r checking ppl's blog in a time like this.
Gd luck peeps.

8 Days to freedom.

2006-09-27T22:43:00.000+08:00

I lost my mood fer studying. Lols, how to lose right ? when there's momentum. Dunno lehs, it was repaired by what ? 2 hrs talk abt maple wif min, char and lyn. Lols..

I 'd say, JJC notes rox. If SRJC teachers were to be like their GP teachers, it would have been much better. It's liddat. Somehow, PPl in jjc dun realise that it's a fortune to have de notes. Haix. i'd go into maple awhile before i sleep. see what de patch done. zZz.. Is fact finding a waste of time ? Or do it even benefit us ??

Maybe SR doesn't wanna feed us, But, why can't they understand. Somehow, i guess, most of us are already put down by many of them, being the last JC. -__-.
Most of us seems to tink abt other school papers " if sr cannot make it, then dun bother abt other school already".
I beg to differ. I juz hope that SR will improve much better to A EXTENT WHERE BY TEACHERS STOP DISCRIMINATING US. It's really like bad lahs. We know we are poor, but u don't have to remind us right ? They seems to put us down to the extend where by we all are deemed as "hopeless".
JuZ dun understand, why can't they juz treat us as ppl that fits de standard of it. As in, they do not put us down or demoralize us that badly. Are SRJC ians that bad ? I do not think so. I do not agree so to. For.. we all have a potential in us.
Be it we make it or not.
Let our talents roll.
Let our potential soar.

Let them come.
Let de promos begin.

Charge ! Onward to the battlefield.
Though it was my first time facing something more scarier in my life, i'd nv was so scared in other exams, not even in O's.

All de best peeps.

2006-09-26T12:10:00.000+08:00

Lols. Lucky me. Princess Joan aka Joan Of Arc has decided to test UrsRoyalAdvisor in a series of questions again. -__-. Awww.. well. Here it does :

1) Do the following
2) Choose 5 people to do this after you've completed yours
3) Leave a tag on their tagboard to let them know

Favourite colour: Violet - Purple ! not magenta. I'm not gay !

Favourite food: anything that's edible, festable n taste all right ?

Favourite movie: Pirates ! Pokemon 2000..Juz like heaven.

Favourite sport: Swimming, badminton. Does dota count ?

Favourite ice-cream: Strawberry ! currently mad over it. Vanilla, choc, juz no odd flavours can liao

Favourite TV shows: Erm, there's a lot. From tintin to de daily serials. lols.

Current mood: SIAN DIAO. i juz finished 2 hrs+ of studying econs.

Current clothes: Calvin n hobbes shirt,orange pants n u know wat inside bah. =X

Current desktop: Joan's blog (to copy questionaire), Window msn, My inbox, my horo.

Current toenail colour: normal. What colour can a guy probably have ?

Current time: 12.14pm.

Current annoyance: Promos. -__-

Current thoughts: Day dreaming that i'd be free of doing anything. hahax.

First best friend: Xin or SSM. Both also can.

First crush: My fav. animal's same syllibe pronoucation, katrine's "sista"

First movie: i tink it was James Bond, tmr nv dies bah. Becoz my uncle gave me n my mum to go watch coz my dad was busy.

Last cigarette: Never. Anti smoke agent.

Last car ride: Last last sat, out to dinner, uncle's car.

Last crush: My Ex.

Last phone call: This morning. Called from de clinic over my appointments.

Last CD played: SYF disc. I so miss tales and leonardus.

Have you ever dated one of your best friends: I'm not handsome. so tat makes a "no-no" factor already. lols. N i wouldn't like ask, coz i know no % stands more. not unless...

Have you ever broken the law: Is lying a law ? If yes, ya. School law counts ma ? If yes, ya. De public law ? no. Maybe talking in the library. Lols.

Have you ever been arrested: by my friends yes. Duno when. by policemen, no. By law, no.

Have you ever skinny dipped: wat de hell is skinny dipped ???

Have you ever kissed someone you don't know: Nope..

Have you ever loved and lost somebody: Yupp.

The five lucky people ~: I tink i'd pass. ZzZ.

2006-09-24T23:41:00.000+08:00

My star :
Behind the quiet facade, i see a young man with a natural sensitivity for his surroundings. One who looks into the deeper things that people overlook. Grow in that quality and throw in courage and confidence and you will make a excellent leader. Put the same quality into your academic work and you will shine. All the best for your promos.

That was the thing given by Ms Tan to me. She's really good at looking at people. i'm not surprised that people can judge with the so little time. She's one of them. After all, i believe everyone has a secret potential in them.

Like many other schools, our school is so good, this this this, that that that. Yeah, somehow i feel i've juz been like in a dream. My mum's fussing over me suddenly becoz i got some skin disorder. Truely, i got woke up this morning becoz she's juz worried. Becoz i'm her only son. -__-

Becoz of this, sometimes i hate it. Becoz she placed all her hopes on me, i juz feel i dun wan to be a replica of her dreams. It's so hard to live someone's dream. Somehow she juz wan me to get to the U. Well, how hard is that ? Will i get there ? i dunno.

All i know is study study study. Lols, frankly, i haven't thrown much thot into what i'd become in future. De only thing i've got on my mind is creativity. Maybe i m lame, but that's de source. Though i muz admit, day dream is a bad habit of it !!

=X i changed the song to persis, best expressing what i m feeling now. de first time i heard this complicated piece, i know it was some kind of story. At first i thot it was about war. Becoz of the starting, then de rest of the parts sound like a city siege liddat.

Until the touching part was a romance of a soldier/hero. He was like fell, wounded. But a gal whom is his lover came to heal his wounds and they enjoy a moment of blissful ness admist the chaotic war. However, there is never peace till de war is over. De hero/ solider rises once more.

He is healed by the wounds, and he hatches a plan and gets it to work. During the canon part, is him executing his plan. After which he succeeded in his plan and fight through the war to the leader. On which the leader sees a losing battle, he zhao, leaving de hero with the trimph theme.

It was juz a summerised version of what i thought it was. If i'd put my imagination here, i guess it'll bored everyone to death. Here, i thx Kay Yoke again. Hahax, wif out you, i'd tink i'll be in tears already then. Thankyou for pulling me up again. =) Wish u luck for the promos

As well as find ur Prince soon.
As for the rest, Jia yOu for promos !!
Gd Luck everyone, Those in Sec 4 ~ prelims n O's. J1 - Promos. J2 -A's, Prelims. Schooling - Exams bahs !
Gd NiteZx

2006-09-24T23:08:00.000+08:00

Aw well, as much as i'd wish to type something down, i got tagged. O_O. Better address it first.

1)single,taken or crushing?
-Single

2)are you happy with your life now?
-Somehow, somewhat, somewhere

3)when you meet the right person,do you fall in love with him/her fast?
- Yes, it perharps was a mistake, though.. maybe a wonderful one

4)have you ever had your heart broken?
-Yes..

5)do you believe that there are some circumstances where cheating love is acceptable?
- Yes, a cheat may be white like leaving someone when u know u cannot be there for her always such as death awaiting.

6)would you take someone back if he cheats on you?
-No,though I wished to. But ppl will get their desserts back. Retribution..

7)have you ever talked about marriage with another before?
- Yeah, mentioned once on my blog. De Beautiful Sakuras.

8)do you want children?
- Yup.

9)how many?
-About 2 to 3 bahs. 2 makes a pair, 3 makes a trio.

10)would you ever consider adoption?
-Maybe. Depends on my status , muz have resources.

11)if someone likes you right now,what do you think is the best way to let you know his/her feelings?
- Declare it with only me and you face to face. at least it won't be embarrassing.

12)do you enjoy getting into relationship?
-Perharps. Chemistry dun work de other way sometimes.

13)be honest,what is the furtherest thing you and your ex did?
- Walk on the street together. a reaction stopped by venus. De chemistry didn't work to bond.

14)do you believe in love at first sight?
- Yes. One wonderful mistake sometimes.

15)are you romantic?
- If u'd consider giving flowers, wanting to hold hands, n to declare my love for her openly.

16)do you believe you can change someone?
- Yes. But it depends if the person wants to change or not.

17)if you could get married somewhere,where would it be?
- A beautiful garden full of blossoms. As the beautiful melodies soar in the air, the light sakuras fall gracefully in the wind.

18)do you give in easily when you are fighting?
- No, not unless i was forced to.

19)do you have feelings for someone right now?
- maybe , perharps, though it was forbidden.

20)have you ever wish that you could have someone but u messed it up?
- Yes. De other side failed. Everything was simply not right.

21)have you ever broken a heart?
-Yes, by mistake. I believe i did, though i nv found out if i did or not.

22)if one day your best friend falls in love with the person you are deeply in love with,what will you do?
- Give my blessings if he succeed. Though i know we 3 muskerteers do not share de same gal styles we prefer.

23)are you missing someone now?
- Somehow, somewhat, somewhere. Perharps.

Now,you have to ask 5 of your friends to do this survey in their blogs.write down their names in the list below.Tag them in their blogs to let them know.
-
1) Poh Wun
2) Pei Wen
3) Cassandra
4) Zaewe
5) Qian Hui

2006-09-18T23:27:00.000+08:00

Today Nv Ending, Tomorrow Nv Coming.

What does it sounds like ? This is de call of the dead that woke me up last nite, or rather this morning.
If u juz died, and turned into a spirit, Wouldn't it looks like today will never end, tomorrow will never come as everyday is practically like the same ??
I'm not dead yet dun worry, or i won't be here. Lols. Fear of death gripped me suddenly after so many years, as always i do not believe death is an option. But it's like uncommonly so.
Why?
After so long, i realise the clostest thing i have to it was the thing that wen hui reminded me of, my past. Have i not vow to take care of you.
Who is going to take care of you after i go ??
It's hurting v. badly inside me as much as i would like to take it out.
But you are doing fine. hais..

I thot i could let you go juz like that. That's probably why i was sick today. but nvm for what reason why i was sick, it doesn't matter if it concerns you or not.
My inside hurts v. much
As much as it does, i try to get it going, it's becoz i was reminded of it.
However, i do not blame he who reminds me of, as.. he was unaware of it.. totally

It has nv occured to him.
It has nv come to him .

Wen Hui, Perharps ur character has solidified to become like that. However, you have also proven that it could be changed. Pray that ur emotions and feelings awake and let them be sensitive to de surroundings as well, as much as you are aware of everything that's happening.

Was looking at photographs. Looking, recalling. Huai nian yi qian. Maybe that's why i was sick. Xin Bin.Meanwhile My neck has strain on the left side, i cannot shift my head to the left. It hurts.
Somehow, i'm losing confidence and hope myself.

I stare at the same battlefield.
De same one that i failed.
Becoz i lost the most important thing at the most crucial moment.

After what i see,
could it not happened again ?
It might not happen the same way, but... accidents do happen.

I nv thot i'd be so vunerable either.
But i guess life does hold surprises.
Let's not hold back anything.

Therefore. People, give in de best you've got now one. Dun hesitate if you'r in JC or not. it won't be worth dwelling if i'd or you'd be better off here and there. Give ur best shot and dun regret..
Let them come.
Let de future unfold before ur eyes.
n let it bring a smile to ur face.

A failure is nv a failure, when you learn something from it.

Can i wish i nv have known you ? or can i juz wish for it not to hurt..

2006-09-16T12:02:00.000+08:00

Hhmm.. everyone's getting stressed up. I guess it's true bahs. Promos are coming, everyone's getting stressed up in a way or another, parents, school, results. blah blah blah.
Life has changed so much. Uncle was like telling me JC's suppose to be playing. Playing refers to CCAs. These is like a prime time fer CCA, then till J2 then study. Uncle's like 5x years old. Somehow i juz realise the gap between education. Furthermore, Ms Teong of my old primary school once said "JC is de honeymoon year" remb guy ?
SOmehow it changed to hell for quite some of us.

or was it ? Perharps fer some of us, it has become sorta of a fixed thing like secondary school bahs. Growing up is a important part of life. "brother " char told me abt her new "baby" in ms, AJ gal who only has 5 hours of sleep each day, but maple oftens ?? Wif SPA coming and all the promos stuff , i guess it's a way of life. Imagine u are in a grounded at home except for going to school, then home's like a prison. Seems like the com's the only escape point of life. To freedom , to see the world out there. Some parents bar children from going out, so i guess it's a way of life. It then cultivates for many ppl out there bahs, study at home. extra time = mapling or doing something else. So i guess we can't really call someone no life can we ?

Enough of something so complicated bahs. Today had abit more patience to let blogger upload pictures. So, i'd delicated de last section of my entry to de 3 Muskersteer's Bd.

De 3 muskersteers. SM's Birthday.

NIE chiu shi

Photo taken : 19 Aug 06

Photographer : Chin Keong ~Co- Chair of FuCK ( Or rather his camera )

My Birthday

Xin, SSM, ME, Clement

Photo entittled :3 G n 1 I ( 3 Genius and 1 Idiot)
Taken : 9 Sept 06

Photographer : SSM ( or rather his phone)

Top: SSM, Me, Zaewe
Down: Jimmy, Xin, Jacqueline

Xin's Bd photo I

Photo entittled : everyone I !

Taken : 15 Sept 06
All below are taken on the same day

Photographer : jimmy ( or rather his phone~ timer mode -Camera stand idea by Zaewe )

Left : Zaewe
Right : Andy
Award : Imaginary FOOLscape Paper.
Photo entittled : Prize presentation

Means - Presentation of prize to de JJC guy on de left, giving him the imaginary award and giving the tittle of " imaginary idoit". He came out wif the idea of putting the cake box to be a camera stand, finally snapping out something from his imaginations at last.
Claps* Claps* Claps*

Once again, the day is saved by Zaewe~
Photographer : jimmy ( or rather his phone)

Xin's Bd photo II

Left to Right : SSM, Andy, Jimmy, Zaewe, Xin, Jac

Photographer : jimmy ( or rather his phone~ timer mode )

Top: SSM, Me, Zaewe
Down: Jimmy, Xin, Jacqueline

Xin's Bd photo III

Photographer : jimmy ( or rather his phone~ timer mode - Camera stand idea by Zaewe )

What are stairs for ?

Left to right : Jac, Xin, SSM, Andy, Jimmy, Zaewe

Photographer : jimmy ( or rather his phone~ timer mode )

The power of the light =X

( face kana block )

Left to right : Zaewe, Andy, Jimmy, Jac, Xin, SSM

Photographer : jimmy ( or rather his phone~ timer mode )

2006-09-13T22:32:00.000+08:00

Back.. to settle down wadever i have to say.

I haven't been blogging. Msn's not working. I fixing the problem while blogging. Somehow, my emotions are not stable yet, that's why i hasn't been blogging.

Why are emotions unsettling ? BecoZ my heart has yet to recover from de incident so long. It's becoz another blow was dealt. not returning to fulfill my wish. I dun wan to bring up, but it's really terrible to see ur dream shattered right infront of you.

So, far... 2 dreams bahs. Shattered into pieces, that broke my glass heart. I m unable to hold much of my emotions, that's why i choose not to blog that much.

Since things that are broken before, they will nv be the same.

Heart, is the one thing that i can nv understand.. i tried to hold back, but i guess it was too much to be hold.

Perception difference was what i tink i m. I'm juz being childish over some stuff ? or being naive once again ? M i wrong to believe in somethings that seems to be so ? Or.. perharps there is another side to things ? It juz seems like i really dunno what to say.

Was it juz fate to work under you and succeed fer once ?

I really tink there's alot of difference in things. I juz tink so.
How can u prioritise things that are less important ?
are there even enough reasons to redeem you of my discrimination against you ?

Furthurmore.. it seems like there's not juz once of violation.
N, i juz dunno how to put it. Is it that one is being over unsensitive to other's feelings?
or juz that, i m compromising too much when i keep my mouth shut.

some people dun realise who they hurt when they speak

Something lighter perharps, regards everyone. Ms Gan was in exceptionally good mood ytd, saying life's little lesson. Everyone muz have had their own opinions abt it. I guess so bahs, everyone knew, childhood would only be the time whereby life is carefree, unbounded by the terrifying backstabs and underhand tactics. It might have already started for some of you, but it's nothing new. In a few years, university will come.

eventually, those who dun learn, learn the hard way..

hais.. reminds me of someone. I HOPE you learn it this year and stop acting cute. =X
Or m i wrong to say so ?

As much as i doubt my judgement of ppl now, here's something i have to say.

By any chance, if u hear lau wen hui spreading rumours abt me regarding this 2 gals in particular, kay yoke and pei wen, pls give him a flying kick or punch. It's not why i'm so concerned over him spreading tis kind of crap over at school. Rumours, have i not had enough since sec 1 ? From sec 1, kana tease by the class all de way to sec 3 juz becoz my pants were so short like mini skirt liddat. BoO ... Sec 3 on at least better life.
De reason is becoz, I HAD ENOUGH!
I almost gave him a punch ytd, becoz too much hatred was gathering inside my veins.But i chill down and relax, becoz i realise i hasn't got so agitated since maple ing. =X KS. It doesn't really makes much sense to you or anyone else but if you wanna try understand it's becoz those 2 were those who lend me a hand when my world was plurge into a thick darkness. Many other people helped too wif them. However, since wen hui pointed them out, i realise gradually what was de connection behind my hatred and de rumours. it's becoz of what they say to make me neturalise the feeling of hopeless ness, in short, it means that whenever you speak of them, my mind jumps to de past. N i had wish to let go of the past.
Wen Hui, you are making things v. contridicting fer me. That is why i will not hesitate not to control myself any more. Promos are coming.
I cannot let what happened before happen again...

I guess that is all for now. It's 11+. Though i wasted 3 hrs at trickster, i m still not really quite fine. Hais~

Yao fang Kai shi bu jian dan de yi jian shi...

Wished for my old maple days....
wished for my old school days...

2006-09-11T17:12:00.000+08:00

Msn is not working. zZz...

I m damn tired. I guess i didn't had a good weekend that's why.
From last week, i've been dota ing on de nights of thurs and fri becoz it was the only time i'd be free to relax. But only like a few matches nia, furthur more sat nid to wake up early for YCP, sun for studying. So sian. that's y i so tired. Failed to recover my sleeping hours.

Everyone needs to sleep a certain amount of hours for the body to rest in order not to feel tired. That's why we can like stay over night wif out sleeping sometimes but recover it back. But of course, wif out resting, de body is weaker as it cannot heal or repair.

I m here to annouce my retreat. I tink most probably this blog will rot, then my maple will be stagnent as well as my dota. So.. ta ta for now !

I tink i shall be back to blog, if there shd be a emergancy..

Sometimes, one's last words can be found that gives many meanings

Tis Song's been changed, but tis does not mean i wan you back.

How can u pierce me so deep in my heart and expect me to forgive you..

2006-09-10T23:35:00.000+08:00

One Bd where u nv get any gifts at all ? That's mine ! =D

I dun wan gifts, it's really fine !. I've to put all thxs to all whom have wished me or remembered by birthday in a way or another. =) Thank you v. much !

Acknowledge list :
let's start wif de first -Siang Meng, Wei Xin, Jacqueline, Clement leong, Han Hong, Zaewe,Stella, Sista, Mum,Keli,Cassandra, Charmaine, Bao, HaiKuan, Jia Qing, Pei wen, Esther, Jun Gui, Justice, Kwek Kiong, Clement Lim, FuQi, Ding Jie, Kester, Jonathan, Kay yoke, Ethel, Meiling, jeremy..

i tink tat's all =P. But well, if ya not on the list put on de taggy ! i shall include you then.
Like i say, good things muz be carved in stone so that they will not be forgotten.

And For some of you, you might have not noticed it. But you've juz given me something. First, to the 3 musketeers and de royal family ~ meaning Clement Leong gang wif de trio best buddies for making celebrations for it pre my birthday. =) GOod Job, well done and i appreciate it.
next to the many many ppl who waste 5 cents of their money or even some moments of their precious time to wish me a happy birthday. =) Thank you so much.
Lastly, to those who unknowingly spend the day wif me,~ Kester, jonathan and Dj. hahax. though i lost in all de dota matches these 2 days, abt 6 matchs 1 win, but i'm satisfied in a while that i was to lose and give you a chance to win over me and accomplish something. Ok i'm not trying to say i'm pro, juz that winning gives u a sense of satisfaction.

Lastly before my bd ends in 10 mins time, where my star will go on it's new orbit. My wish.
I wish that :
~ All person that i suppose will promote will, as i tink that some of us that cannot make it shd be better off somewhere,
~All my friends and familes to enjoy great wealth and fortune, blessing them
~ And that i will always be myself always, enjoying everything.
My new goals ??
I dun really know. But.. as far as i'm concerned..
Promos lors.
=X Other than tat...
Find someone ? Someone that is so close to my heart, yet so difficult to find.
That is none other than... one that will appear after the A's.
It will be that way.

Meeting you was a mistake, but a beautiful one.
But mistakes have to be corrected,
And since you wish it to be corrected.

then.. let me hold no further anything back..
Let your pink marks cover de purple onces.
Let my memories then, be corrected by ur pink fades.

Nv..
Meeting..
you..

~ ForGet.. you.. yeS

Though.. i always hope.. tis mistake is miracle's accident.

- No Longer..

2006-09-10T10:07:00.000+08:00

17 Yrs have juz passed in a blink..
Right at this day, a new revolution for my star starts.
Let the guardians above bless..
and shine upon the path i walked once more.

It's suppose to be a special day, yet spoilt by one single thing.
Furthermore, my mum's agitating me.
I wanted to blog last nite becoz i was so mad, but instead i carried forth my anger.
zZz.. i feel so childish. But nvm. My emotions are unstable now.
it's becoz of something..

Steve irwin died on mon, i know it's almost been a week. My close friend's uncle died as well, in a car accident.
Bless both of you. The world has lost 2 fine men.
Rest In peace.
In memory of Steve irwin and my close friend's uncle.
Let their souls ascend to find peace in the heavens.
May they be remembered in our hearts forever.
Till de end of time.

Dunno lahs. On the whole, i m fine.
Yet, seriously.. i really isn't.
But how m i to tell u the emotions overflowing in me.

Mr Ng was right. All gatherings are considered a bliss.
Thanks Jimmy, Xin, SSM, Clement and Jac, who made special arrangements last night.
I guess, after so many years, tis is my first ever celebration out really.

Those secondary years were hard to find a compianion.
But those that went out with me also didn't really know it was special fer me.
well, nvm. it's still on the same issue, becoz i thot u knew, but u have forgotten completely

I'm now going to state a fact, which most of you knew.
I failed to make it back to New Town n it's all my fault.
I shd have left the school immediately, knowing de distance.
yet i didn't.

Friends and Teachers waiting forth my return, forgive me.
I know i've juz missed seeing you.
Ms Lee's getting older, if she retires tis year, i'd nv get to see her again =X
So does all de rest of the chers. U nv know abt their conditions.
HaIx.. If Only...

The other details might hurt, so i've decided after so long, it's juz my plain fault. Let those hatred and anger vanished in the snow.
Snow prints will heal by themselves, for snow storms occurs.

This is a interesting story to share :
There was once this 2 friends who were in a desert. Guy A and Guy B. Guy A suddenly spoke of a sensitive issue and pissed guy B off. Guy B then slapped and hit Guy A hard. Guy A stopped, then with his hands wrote the incident on the sand.
After that they continue walking. Guy A then suddenly fell into a pool of quicksand. Guy B immediately saved Guy B. This time, guy A carve the incident on stone. Guy B was v. curious, then he asked Guy A what he was doing. he said :

" When someone close hurts you, you muz write it in the sand to forget and let the wind blow away the sand to forgive.
When someone close does a good deed for you, you muz curve it in stone so that the wind can nv blow it away and can be remembered forever. "

U didn't understand at all.
You still dun know.
I really tink that you muz reselect your effectiveness.

SOmethings you simply can't let go, and let the present take.
Yet you want to hold on to everything, FINE
HOld On then.

Like i said, if you wan to make mistakes.
Make Sure you can pay them for the price.
Let me emphasis again, somethings can be compromised.

Situation : " If you'r left in a situation whereby your teammates, Z X Y is seriously injured and so are you. In order to heal Z completely, you need X's help first. In order to heal Y completely, you need Z and X's help. However Y and X is in grief danger and requires treatment first. You can try to heal them urself, but you can only hold them awhile more. Ur condition isn't as serious as them.
Obivously, one till try to heal Y and X to hold their conditions right ?
No, you didn't. Neither did you heal Z, you saved your own skin. Healing Urself DOES NOT INCREASE THE FACT THAT YOU ARE EFFICIENT. Then you tried to save Z, which is totally out of point. So you left Y to die, becoz you tried you best to save X.
INSTEAD, you shd have healed Y and X, then heal Z, heal X and then heal Y.

If You Nv heard of the witch testing the fisherman, then YOU BETTER GO AND KNOW.
It's not abt how you solve it. It's abt de morale of the story.

One fine day, a witch carried a cat, a mouse and a bag of rice and wanted to cross the river. However, she forgot to take something. Then she asked the fisherman to take her stuff across first while she go back and take something. De fisherman's boat have only one space to carry one object.
If he take the cat across, the mouse will eat the bag of rice.
If he take the rice across, the cat will eat the mouse.
If He failed to succeed in ferrying the witch's items, he will be turned into a Frog.

Heh. Are u stucked ? THEN USE UR BRAINS IN THE FIRST PLACE.
SOMEthings by nature do stack together, JUZ THAT YOU NV DID USE UR EYES TO SEE THEM.
My last words for you : Pay DE PRICE OF uR Foolishness.
For, i really dun understand you completely, you make hell out of a heaven.
If you'd find out why, maybe it wasn't too late. It's not attitude problem. It's perception.
Maybe you did realise if things were to be taken from another prospect it might have been better ?? What If you did realise that something you did was actually wrong ??

My Ending Phrase :

De Sadness of the skies rained upon today's day.. drenching the whole special day.

HaiX..

2006-08-29T23:30:00.000+08:00

It was a horrible day.
Compared with ytd.
It'll be...
Juz like 3 yrs ago tml.

Faced it once again..
I know how much it cost to revive my memories.
It always come wif out you knowing..

vanquishing you slowly in the inside.
eating up everything u sough to fough against..
and destroying the hopes you once held..

That.. perharps.. will be the price you shall pay.
Paid, i have. Full price ? I haven't..
Or i shall not be in SR but somewhere where de living do not dwell.

See it.. I saw Mr Chan's shadow arising in mdm chong.
Coz mdm chong had no voice, suddenly realized 3 long years have past since.
It'll be her 3 anniversary this year.
De day right after the promos.

Dunno why i got to face wif this kind of things.
BUt i'm more or less prepared.
I juz wished, u can pay wif out anything wif me, whether u like it or not.

All of us saw, knew and heard.
What happened today is maybe de beginning.
There's more OP to come..
there's more harshness to come.
People.. let's not get depressed and work hard.

I shifted de bearings accordingly, in hope to steer out of this raging sea.
Yet you shifted my bearings, in favour of the wind.
If wind was what that'll get us out of the sea.. i follow.

I follow ur navigations with sea spray at us.
De Maiden's star Dims furthur..
Is there no end to this sea...

Wind can changed anytime, anywhere.
Wind is juz but an element to aid or destroy you.
Can i always say they'r juz guidelines ?

-Dead or alive, one muz be flexible-
Too long have i waited for de coordinates..
Too long have i been left in the darkness..

time.. is of .. the essence.. 11.30 wif nothing at hand, dozing away.....

If u knew, then speak de burden you hold so dear.
No one's gonna know what you bear for...
For you've shown us disgrace.

Once bitten twice shy...

2006-08-24T20:04:00.000+08:00

Talk aftermath- Cont'D.

SRJC. It's not like we'r lost, hopeless or anything. If there was anything that you all out there can do, IS STOP THIS TOP 25 % THINGY. It's irritating.
Even if we'r top 25 so ?
Who won't complain if their interest are not taken into consideration at first ?
This is so frustrating.

Wednesday, suppose to be a CCA. I fret , you fret becoz there's chemistry test tml. Other than that... there's still stuff to be done !!
May i remind you this is a JC, and that we all function concentrated more many many times than a secondary school.
In secondary school can slack so much, but here in JC, you can't.
Maybe i juz wasted say 3 hours away ? 5 - 8, doing music, tv and relaxation. Seriously, it's still no break for me. it's liddat. Getting back to work soon.

Like what Mr Ng said, if there's no SRJc, perharps another school would have come. But the fact of this society what deemed equal, is who puts SRJC when u have a RJC around ?
It's not like we'r hopeless, and like you said we'r top 25% . Dots..
Even though we shdn't compare ourself wif people lower than us, but pls DO not discriminate us becoz we'r poor ? inefficient ?
Tink of how many atimes many of you teachers pile tutorials on us, and days we get day off, hardly any.
Tink of times you put us down, juz over some things. Are sadistic comments or opinions you share abt us doing us any better.

This is juz a general statement for many, it's a common problem for alot of people but i guess not for our class ? still manageable.

Well i got nothing else to say. Tired..
I fell asleep while studying CHemistry. I tink my body can no longer hold the exhuastion to keep up. So i had to compromise my test. Hais, it's something i dun wan to do, but i guess.. i slept soundly and sweetly =). THough it was a no dream sleep, but.. juz glad to have those few hours of rest.

Fishies dun fly, but when they do, only then they become wif de maiden's friend.
Lion can be friendly and unfriendly, for virgin maiden is vunerable to.

These 2 phrases meant nothing to most of you perharps, but when u realise what they mean, it might apply to you bah... observe.

Juniors, prelims in 19 days. Ok no more juniors. Sec 4S band Members !! Jia YoUU !! =D
That's all.. all JIA YOUU !! =D Promos, Prelims.. wadever ur headache is abt now.

2006-08-24T06:22:00.000+08:00

De deepest wound in ur body lies within ur heart, for there is always a scar left after each wound..

Wanted to blog ytd but i can't get into blogger !! keep loading and dunno what. Sian diao. Was planning to blog during commercials while watching the funny show of "hai de er zi" but plan fail.
I still like my blog's fields of hope =)

Let me explain 3 things in my entry :
Theory of girls.
Talk aftermath aka Philip's wrath
TIRED !!

For theory of girls, it's not abt any theory abt girls. INSTEAD, it's something which is so -__- untheortical ( not theory ).
The other day, i boarded this bus where there was this boy and girl, they obviously knew each other, i tink they were classmates but somehow, becoz of the bus quene, u know there's 2 paths into the bus, one left and right. I manage to come in between those 2. Lols, i sound so much like a lightbulb. Then she stood infront of me at the door exit, while the boy was behind. I decided to move her front since there was space. HOWEVER, the bus started to move as i crossed. The girl let me crossed, but she didn't grip well and almost fell =X. I feel so bad lahs. Tink she's pissed wif me. ? i dunno. Lols..
For the same happening on monday, before chemistry in the afternoon, i went to tell Xiao Bao aka captain bao abt Ms Cheng inside LT 3 liao, then there was a group of girls that were trying to enter. Mao's class de, coz Mao walked out of LT 4 wif bao liao. -___- As i opened the door, one of the girl whom i assume was trying to open was shocked ? I tink. Or rather, she gave the kind of expression like i looked like an alien or something. o_O BUt somehow, i tink she's pissed as well.
Isn't it 2 girls i've offended in the same day.
YTD.. I was abt to get a book across to Siew Ming. I didn't see jeremy's hand, then as i was abt to launch the book, seeing his hand juz made my force reduced by 1/2. I couldn't like control it lahs, then i let go ler. So, this book fell without much force on the floor. It looked like it was delibrately but it was not !! I'm sorry !! Worst is jeremy's been adding de extra comments. Blah =X..
Seriously, at this rate, the whole school's girls is going to treat me like a 'natural enemy"
So much for theory of girls.

Talk aftermath.

Somehow, Philip tan's msg caused warm waters among some of us becoz it touched the hearts of many. It cannot be prevented. Those innocent people listening to the talk were not spared. Indeed, the innocent are not spared.
They are made to suffer. This arises with people reverting from innocent to "dun care" since they get punished as well. But i guess, there are still people who are innocent all along, even if they were to be alone.
Being part of the school, it was difficult to agree that we all aren't the standard.
But, always remember, it's not we that don't uphold ourself.
How many sacastic comments been passed down by our "wonderful" teachers,
whom you speak of as greatness and value ?
U wan examples, i give you.
1S14. GP. Go try. If Ms Goh hasn't relieved one lesson, i bet no one even knew abt it.
Is speaking prohibited that you deemed us as isolent creatures not worthy of speaking.
I tink S14 people have been used to it.
Or rather, it seems like, even if we uphold the right, society will ?
In everyone's eyes, till they'r right in the spot of where people are, right in their shoes then they begin to realise things they've nv really done before.
That's why, considering humanity is different from theory.
I nV liked theory, that's one thing you should know. Even though we uphold laws, but these are guidelines for us to behave properly.
I can't stand people who goes on talking abt theory theory theory WHEN you are not one urself.
U can have all the things in the world, but theory wise ?- we are not perfect. we make mistakes.
=X got to go school ler. Come back to talk more bahs.

2006-08-22T20:26:00.000+08:00

Blogging before i bath. Dad's complaining that i haven't eaten.
FUCK.
It's becoz i juz reached home, sista using the bath room, then i decided to change to blogging, juz as sista finish bathing. DAd's OBVIOUSLY acting like a child.
IDOIT.
I juZ lost my mood.. but.. it's not easy to lose track of what i wan to put down here.

I dreamed of someone i liked last night.
I shdn't put it down, becoz i'm not suppose to.
It was juz a day that finally things are to clear.
It's de dream, i won't know.
You came wif 1 man, 1 young cute girl.

That girl said: " Kor Kor, will you not abandon Jie Jie ?"
she shook my hand and said.
You looked at me, with nothing to say.
De harmless silence i knew before was now hurting.
I held back, the man left, so does the girl.
As you turn to walk away,
i asked:
" is it leaving without leaving me anything ?"
You then walked towards the piano and played.

It was Yi Lu Xiang Bei.

Another girl came and pulled me away.
becoz, i was pierced by the deadly music that shattered the glass heart of mine.
As pieces of them fell together the ground, so does warm water from my eyes.
I could not feel anything.

She pull me away, before.. the last piece fell.

i wouldn't know what'll happen, i woke up after that. Aw well, it's juz a dream.
Meanwhile, i was trying to say, our band teachers are concerned abt us. I forgot to mention it when i talked abt teachers last nite. They didn't ask a Teacher's day concert from us. Actually, i was hoping so much, but they knew we couldn't manage as we are busy.
=) I guess.. thxs.
First time after 2 yrs, other than Mr Neo and Mr Er, all the concert aftermath and children's day gift, as well as Mr Er's concern for my face indirectly, somehow it's another time i feel warmth from my teachers in band. Thank you.

Can you sail under a captain wif a broken compass ?
not if ur captain is jack sparrow, or one experienced.

Everything in the world can be bought, except experience itself.
Possess and drew the ambition you have.
Yet, cruising aimlessly past the dead seas have no meaning.
As other ships sail forth the habour,
storms and tidal hit our ways.
Ship was enough,
but de bearing..

I will not blame anyone, for failure is part of life.
Juz know, paying de fees for failure hurts.
I juz hope you can pay, wif out any grudge.

Always remb, a failure is nv one.. when u learn something..
It's a lesson then.

Let darkness despair, let darkness fall..
Let ur world darkened.
But.. de light muz nv go out.

2006-08-21T22:22:00.000+08:00

I tink i'm in love wif strawberry. De advisor's fav. pick now eh? Lols.. chocolate isn't tat nice always eh for a favour ? i dunno.i juz find chocolate nice but strawberry fav. nicer !! Maybe i'm juz strawberry sick, or luv sick coz strawberry is pink ? =X oh my god, what m i saying. Ok nVm.. strawberry PoKey is nice.

Anyways.. been too busy lately. I juz realise everyone's getting stressed up. I M ALSO !!...
So many things, so little time...
I guess it can't be helped.

HuiLin was commenting why here got so many "reasoning". LoLs, perharps when u truely realise the true meaning of this blog, then u won't ask me, why this blog is like this.
MISCellous lies the clue to the truth.

But few are able to find, despite things being there all the time...

Princess Charis, perharps people find hope on these reasoning.
Why b so pessimisstic. Though in this world, we know limits bound up our ability.
But.. there is no limit to creativity and many other things.

De knight has fallen.
Leaving the kingdom of luv at last.
I know now, LiL princess, you were nv meant to be mine.
Pls forget me, fer your kingdom only awaits a prince to come.
I will not leave you by ur most needed hour,
but there will no longer be a need for me any more till....

Wat is there to blog? I wanted to type de suddenly juZ vanished from my head. I WAN TO GO SLEEP!! it's only 10+ but i guess i took at look at the maths tutorial and juz had de blur blur look. Lessons from 8- 6+.
Started from GP(free), PE, Maths, Chemistry,Econs,PW, Econs test,Maths remedial. Seriously, it is really tiring me. Suddenly dawn to me last time how slack we were. Got to change tat attitude.
Well, people i'm still doing fine. I hope you are as well. =D
I would like to say, Teachers, u really work v. hard. Look at the maths tutorials, i can see that mr anuar has juz left his comments.

I HATE "don't cha".. They keep playing it during PE.
i dunno why. But really.. now..
it seems like.. you have provoked my memories..
becoz u told me "dont cha" tat time...
a lot of things will change under ur rule..
and once more.. i shall try to change it..
fer.. i m leaving ur kingdom ..
A kingdom fit for a prince only..
not plain man like me.

I tink tat's all . It's 11. I guess i spent too much time concentrating my thots. Tat's it for now i guess =X Mum disrupted my thots. " go n sleep". boooo... -__-

May de stars shine across the purple nite once more..
i give you my blessings under the blue moon..
Only maybe vanish forever in ur memories after..
that..

2006-08-20T23:25:00.000+08:00

I juZ added some music here. COz i still couldn't figure out de mid thingy. Ok nvm that.

I've got back Fields oF hope. From Gundum Seed series.
To ur right are the jap lyrics.
To ur left are the english translation for the lyrics.

Was watching seed Destiny juz now. 08 and 07 that i left on my com. SUddenly then i realise i haven't watched anime fer a long long long time. Been reading more manga only. Other than tat ? HW HW HW, PW PW PW, all de W u can tink of.. tat starts ends wif WORK. zZz...
So Sian Diao. But luckily tis isn't forever and we got times to relax. or else can die.
But promos coming..
So muz study. yupps..

Reading through so many blogs. Some how reading abt this tis that that. Hhhmm.. all of you are concerned abt SYF. Who isn't. zZz.. somehow it's hard to tell you guys to relax i know. But a worried heart isn't going to do much either. So, tat's y i'm keeping a positive attitude..
It juz looks like last year. Many schools dun face the problem of not enough people. I guess this is the 2nd time it is.
I thot this time, let's all get our juniors here. Lols, i forgot. This is SR. if it was JJ, maybe i tink ppl like cass, those in the west region can come. But here, in the north, who can i get ?? aii yo...
anyways, who will come also ? I juZ pray compass ppl come to SR. hahax. Budden mr er's band all can DSA into SA lahs. Juz hope first 3 months i'll ask mr er to help me =X if really no choice. hahax, wonder if it could be done. After all, compass is a big band !

Other than that, was suppose to sleep at 10+. 9+ bath, cut nails, practise instrument. I went to play Piano instead after cutting my nails. An Jing. Still An Jing. Then went to practise instrument. Seventh Night of July is V. NICE !! =D. till 10.30 like that, then came online to fix my blog. then chat wif Xiao Qian, clement and so on till now lors. nearing 12. Lols, so much for sleeping early.
NiteZx !

2006-08-19T00:10:00.000+08:00

What you see is not what i tink.
what i tink is not what you see.

What see you across the distance lands..
what do u not see across those lands..

Can u light up paths in de dark ?
Or will you choose to be those who prefer de dark..

What was here
was here..
What not meant to be here
won't be..

Only you know it..
For, if you wake up.
everything is juz a dream.
Consider abt it. or..

Ra will determine it.
Heart is most pure at ?

HE who spills his blood and flesh to show "what ?"
N.. what have u learnt ?

Ans nid not be exact. Ans nid not be proven. Ans jUz nid to be shown.
For.. in tis world,
nothing fears everything,
everything fears nothing.
If there's nothing to fear, everything there is to worry.
If there's everything to fear, nothing will left to worry.

2006-08-15T22:09:00.000+08:00

Will u sail under command of a pirate, or can u not ? Points a dagger at will as Jack Sparrow spins it and hands him the handle.

Where does the ship theory fits in ? I really dunno...

Whole of us into one ship, for.. we are united as one.
A huge leak has appeared on de room marked PoRtOngdus JEntuC TeniWales ORtiK.
I see, one leader lost in her chaos, becoZ reality fails to sit in.
U can have all de things in the world, but u'r nv going to create miracles.
I see, a lost soul searching herself for answers that maybe nv b found ?
U are who u urself are. If everything else fails to set in, what r u busy wif ?
I see, one young man with knowledge but no valour.
Courage, strength, emotions run dry, u r as lost as i m.
As much as i m in de room myself, trying to repair the leak.
Leak was caused unknowingly, for we are all in the dark.
Could it have been de imagination " it will nv leak ?"
Lost.. The 3 have their own ways to solve it,
but atlas, tis room alone might fail.
i m worried twice as much, to drown and die.
Once dead, everything placed in so far might crease to fall.

Even if a tsunami, sea monster come, the ship will stay afloat, the sails will remain..
Cannons shall fire once more in trimph.
May my ship fall...
I won't let my dreams perish.
For.. i will live to see you.

It's jUZ my imagination at work. nvm if u dun understand.

Attitude is one thing that work wonders.
Maybe de "kun" vermin onboard our ship shd get alive =X
Sick of de sight of it. I rather change you wif some people who wans to go JC instead of MI lahs.

Suppose to blog shortly, i guess i let my thots run.. too long.
HaiS.. i'm racing against time, one long race, i nv race before. But..
it'll be a challenge, i will over come.

A little story : ( skip if u hate reading stories)
Both of us looked at each other. Wif wide arms and a dark purple robe and hood, he covers himself perfectly. There was no way to determine where he was from. Why would he come assassinate the princess ? There was no time to think, he sped at me.

I was hooded as well, for guardians are not suppose to reveal who you are. It makes us vunerable when our identities are know. Wearing also a purple robe and hood, he looked like me. except, he was wearing different boots and gloves. Black gloves, leather boots. I was wearing mitril gloves and boots, special gifts from my friends. Mitril, lightest yet hardest material. But it became a par wif leather. His movements are swift and strong, as expected of a assassin. Weiding a short dagger, he attacked me using the Ki Ku Do sword style, concentrating on hidden moves. It was not too hard for me as i have encountered this move before, juz that i was tinking who was he.

Ki Ku Do had a final stroke, known as "the spar". It was when de second last skill is excuted, "Everyone takes it's place" becoz the move was made such tat both fighters will move back to a destination facing each other directly, like juz a shoulder away. It was very dangerous, for a shoulder away could mean a blade's distance, to kill and vanquish you.

Something caught my eye while he excuated "everyone takes it's place". His moves are extremely graceful and unusual, completely different from all i've known. As i countered the move, we both now stand face to face, juZ a shoulder away. Suddenly, i could not bear to kill him.
He resembles someone v. closely, yet i was unable to find who was it in my memory.
Too late, he drew his sword and attacked me in mid way. i drew my left hand to block and right hand to uncover his face.
"You.." ( Both of us share de same thots )
Ting*.. something fell.
Both of us knew it. Both of us suddenly got it.
Flesh blood dripped from my left hand, "his"hood fell, revealing the straight purplish black hair as they fell un supported. "His" eyes now looked at me in dismal and 'his' beautiful lips could not speak a word. I, did know know what to return in exchange for 'his' silence.
Drip.. drip.. drip..
My blood continues to drip. "he" drop the dagger immediately, as "he" rushed up to me.
I picked up the shiny object tat fell wif my right hand.
"he".. de one who gave me the object, was none other than de gal whom i saved 5 days back, at the tavern of eternity, at the point of time i arrived at his tavern. She was a begger then, asking de tavern master, who was my friend for some drinks. My friend gave her some , then she was attacked by a gang of ruffians. Those idiots muz have taken advantage of being as a group to bully as they have no proper skills. She, was too weak to retaliate then, so i got up and got those ruffians out of the way within a matter of a few seconds. She got up and our eyes met...a kind of warmth was in her despite her ugly and untidy looks. She looks juZ right.. her innocent eyes did not blink despite my straight staring. Maybe it was juz rude of me to stare at her but i could not help take a few more glances. She blinked at me, then showing a sign she was fine.
I asked my friend for some clothings, which his wife brought me some immediately. I gave her de bundle, but she would not accept it. But her exhuastion got better of her and she fainted. I ask my friend's maids to bath her, give her proper care and concern for the next few days. With that, i left.
When i returned 3 days later, left a shiny object.
Coral of the Eternity.
De coral i placed near my friend's tavern near the sea shore.
It had a special meaning.

-To be Continued -

2006-08-14T00:10:00.000+08:00

Couple...

I'm not talking abt physics. I dunno what m i feeling like now too.
I juZ wondered for a moment.
Who m i looking for ??

Extinct i told myself..
De breed of gal i m looking for .
maybe not breed, species.

I'm not looking for a princess.
i tink my heart knows that.

ARGH.. my mum !!!... Sleep sleep sleep is all she say, now i forgot what i wanted to type. dotx...

Hais, dunno what to pen down now, kana told off by her. PISSED.

I still miss you. It's true.
But, i tink i'm going to stop it from flowing freely in my mind any more.
It's not healthy to tink abt you.

YOu nv gave me a reason to tink abt you anyways..
N.. you won't need me back in ur life any more.
so mind as well give the place in ur heart to someone else =X

Talking rubbish here i tink.
I didn't mention abt fire works last nite.
=) it was de greatest nite but i tink being blocked by the tree was something that was really kinda spoilt everything. Everything was dull for charis, maybe ur mood's abit ruined.
Other than that, i would say, today looks like last year end, wif xin and meng, strolling marina square. coZ we ended up at 7-11, same as ytd, except that ytd was led by me n marina square has already become a familar place to me.
I haven't done 35 qn of maths. I'm so dead.
Hectic week coming up along.
I'll persersever.
De rest of us muz jia youu.
Gd NiteZx..

P.S. Credits to Qian Huii and Qinzi. =X Thanks. I juZ used something of urs to make improvement to my skin. hope u dun mind. i credits u 2 ler. =)

2006-08-13T01:01:00.000+08:00

I was sitting 61 back alone, becoz the guys decide to try to work out some 'guys' stuff, which i presume was chee siong's another plot to uncover another gal's heart.
Aww well, in short.. to chat ? -__- nvm whatever he was doing.

Mother, boys. Saw a mother gave his seat to her boy, which is around primary school, about P5 i tink ? he was reading a book. Both his parents are quite old already, around 5x i tink, mother around 4x maybe, older than my mum. She touched his hair, only to be stopped by her son's reaction. It's not one time, but a few times. I gues sthe mother gave up, hahax, it was a joke lahs.
Girls.. women.. u muZ nv touch a guy's hair. Dun ask me why. I dun mind u all touching my hair =X.. juz i guess maybe they spend so much time styling their hair and if ur magic touch is going to spoil it, i guess they won't let you. I dun style my hair, tat's y =X maybe..

So, for the long cut version, pls read the other ppl's blog.
Princess QinZi aka Joan, Princess Charis or Captain Pohwun aka Justice.
It all begin last nite, when they were discussing abt it and finalize to meet at 6 at city hall.
Of course i'm not going to begin my story from ytd and what they discuss, so let's juz skipped to when i met them.
=X i was late, but not later than charis. LoLs, QinZi, Jeremy and Justice were at Pastamania liao. Somehow they manage to find their way there, GREAT ! then i heard justice didn't know how to go Suntec.
Before i reached, Justice said " me, Jeremy, joan and joan's bf." i actually believed him. LOLS.
Then i reached liao, he said :" ya lahs, Me, jeremy, joan and joan's bf" Which means me. DOTS. How lame can he get lahs. =X
TheOne kept talking to Princess QinZi, then from her entry
"crap. AND, most importantly, I also spit out the pasta from my mouth. AGAIN, it's all thanks to The One who kept talking rubbish to me and he saw that embarrassing action. CRAP!! Anyways, Princess Charis joined us after our dinner. Yeah.. we bought Mocha Frappuccino from Starbucks to quench our thirst"
I guess tat explained everything tat happened later.
Yes, this part is juZ waiting and moving slowly like a slow march liddat among the people in the Esplanade. Worst is we got a tree blocking at the spot we finally took. Seriously, i'm not going to watch fire works at Esplanade any more unless there are valid reasons, becoZ TAT TREE BLOCKED 1/2 of the whole screen for viewing fire works. Aww well, u can't chop it off i guess, so we'll have to take another route.
For de next part, Princess Charis and me was separated from Princess QinZi and her royal captain + de guard. I guess becoZ Captain though tat 3 rights make a turn, so when i said right, he took a left =X. So end up , i got up, tried to cross the road but was stopped by a traffic police. Then i took a through the car park then wif princess charis.
Took some time to find de rest.
MEANWHILE, Captain thot i was up to something and pass the rumour of "scandal". DotX....
As extracted from QinZi's blog on on her account

"Anyways, we took a scandalous picture of Princess Charis with her Royal Advisor. Wahaha.. though The One took a clearer and better picture, he didn't bluetooth to me for me to post up. However, I'll post up the picture I took! Oh ya.. I also took a picture on The One, leaning next to some sort of short pole, talking to his 'mum' over the phone. Mr Jeremy and I were like laughing away as everyone was like heading out from Esplanade and The One was still leaning over the thing, talking happily with his 'mum'. HAHA

My left shoe was spoilt all thanks to them for jay-walking. I tripped over something and I got stuck. For some reason, my shoe spoilt. Crap. Today is just not my day at all. The One was trying to be funny and wanted to offer either his left shoe or his sock to me. Nice try huh. Comparing our foot's size, mine is 6 and his is 12. Now you know the BIG difference between a girl's and a guy's foot size. We shouldn't have gone to Marina Square and this incident will then not happen. We should have just gone to Raffles place and we can get to see The One's 'mum'. In case you didn't notice the inverted commas, it's not his mum at all but his.. Well.. it's for your imagination to run wild now (: "

o_o That explained fully the next part. =X Princess QinZi i feel so bad lahs. LoLs.
I'm REALLY SORRY.
Forgot Gals wear slippers and it's bad to ask them to hurry.
I failed my theory of girls. I'm sorry.

=X I tink i was quite bad to left u all to navigate ur way too. Sorry Royal Squad !! =X

Hhhmm it has been a long entry, and those of you who consider the above more of 'copying' tat's becoz my heart has juz ran out of life. I'm dead beat.

Hw tml, + her. Worries in my heart. Undescible-able feelings run deep. I really dunno how to let you go. It's becOZ i promised you so. Ai ni ai de hen shen.( love you too deeply)
I guess, tat's y i can wait for a person for a long time.

I juZ dunno, i juZ dun understand. It's all written in my heart. But my heart is dead.
Can i juz set things aside for once ?

Gripping the pieces of my heart together, for.. tml still awaits me. Fall, i muz not.
Go .. i will.
i guess, it takes some time for storm to get over while sailing onboard this ship.

NiteZx

2006-08-12T00:51:00.000+08:00

back from De fire works...
Today's fire works way way way roxs..
different from those on Tuesday...

A sense of achievement today..
=) made it in time to bring them to de place that gave them de nice view of fire works.
Chee Siong, Mingde, Olivia, Chiong Kiong.

Olivia was tearing mingde's shirt off becoz tat idiot was scaring her with all de creepy tales.
=X Mingde lahs, scare ppl, later u no more shirt then lols lahs !!..

then he finally stopped.. hahax, scared of olivia tearing his shirt.
Olivia kept thinking we could not make it, perharps a little motivation got her moving and delighted in the end, when de fire works started.
It brough beams to their amazed faces.
Perharps it's not de best place to view, but among de best place.

Somehow,it's warmth i feel. It's nice =)
Remember, when u do things, sometimes muz not look at the outcome and de price.
If it is worth it, maybe u shd.
It's not where you watch fireworks with, it's who u watch fire works with.

a distant away, where xin and jac enjoys themselves at de esplanade for fire works.

Watching fire works somehow might consume time, de most precious thing, but yet it's something that u'll nv forget. It may be like frequently this week, yet how many a times can u watch it with other ppl...
+ fire works dun happen everyday in Singapore.
More over, when watching fire works together, it's time where all ur friends watching with you take some time off whatever they're doing too.

i miss you still, wishing you were there with me to watch de beautiful lights flashing across the sky. I know i'll nv have the chance again i tink.
Snow may fall, Leaves may drop,
One thing for certain...
you'll nv return back to my side...

i'm fine.. juZ some confessions of my heart. Jiu Shi Fang Bu Kai...

Like all mummy in the world, Complain complain complain. It's 1 now. I know lahs, but at least let me finish blogging rite ? They ruin my mood sometimes.

NiteZx

2006-08-10T01:40:00.000+08:00

Fairy tales...

If i classified my past as a fairy tale, would i be de main character ?
n her the female lead ??
Or was it even a prelude or side chapter ?

When we are reading a story, when we know the main lead and female lead, we often know what's going to happen.
But sometimes, is it really possible to know ??
Nvm, not important to know either.

dunno what to say now.
If u ask me, what are the front words for ?
N why m i clinging on to something tat might nv happen ?
Perharps.. i'm juz giving myself some false hopes bah, maybe it's better this way.

Sometimes, dun really happen like they should. So i guess it's not easy to really forget so fast ?
Meanwhile..
The past is also like that mah.. Past of my flute memories.. Past of "wini- gang"..
Is it swt or bitter ? I couldn't tell u that, on the overall, it juz looks fine. Yet to forget one is to forget another, so in the end all links up to each other. Can i juz throw the whole thing juz like that ? i hope i can, but.. i guess it's not possible..

Furthurmore, i exsist as a memory left in everyone's heart. As time passes and distance grows between us all, i guess.. only when memories reveal themselves, then we go finding back things that seem, so warm, yet so long ago. Or maybe, something that left deep within you.
But i know the value of me is something that can be replaced...
eventually to be forgotten..
Coz there's nothing memorable that's able to shape me in ur heart memories.

I sound as if i was like dying liddat. No lahs, perharps that might answer ur Qn, Chee Siong. Do i know her? yes i do, but she choose to mis understood everything that i said and do, that i have no control over and what would u wan me to do when she insists on calling u thief if u haven't stole anything ??
Deep misunderstanding draws, like what i'll put what i chose. Seal this memory and let time absorb it away. For.. time heals all wounds ( as much as i'm not convinced of this myself)

NiteX.

2006-08-09T18:09:00.000+08:00

S 13 gateway !!
De Steam boat gang..
Fire works !!

Wah seh.. i sian of uploading on to blogger. So SLOW. zZz i upload again one day.. zZz

2006-08-09T12:54:00.000+08:00

I know.. it is hard to navigate the previous skin. It looks different in many windows. Some computer will see it as the whole thing being messed up =X.. tat's wrong with the blog map. Anyways.. it has been a long day on the 8 Augest !! Check out some of the pictures.. I'll put them on the next entry.. Uploading is so slow lahs !! scroll down !!

2006-08-06T23:22:00.000+08:00

A small flame rises admist the icy barriers of my heart..
It burns weakly, yet able to withstand the icy conditions of my heart...

I know..
U have been revived admist the ashes.
i missed you loads.

It's juZ painful to know.. yet i still like your wonderful smile.
A lot of things.. u left behind are still strong here, despite several efforts to bring them down.
I guess i can't blame you.
you are rich.. alot of things aren't meant to be like that for you.
It was like a heaven and earth apart for both of us.
It was written like a suit impossible to woven.
Yet, that fairytale came through like my dreams.
Yet, this exceptional bond was forged between us both.
It was juz like a touch of reality that broke de fairytale.
It was..
It was....
It was......
Jer Li hao "AN JING"

Dwelling of the past.. i juz knew they can't juz pass like that. Time heals all wounds ??
I tink i'll need to reconstruct my life again. Somehow muZ kick this habit of complaining at every single teacher, ok not every single one maybe, but i feel abit bad somehow =X. Who won't be angry at them ? But Muz be more respectful of them and understand them too. zZz..

Study hard would also be an compulsory, i dun wish to retain.
Other than that ?
i'll say.. HAPPY NATIONAL DAY.
those 4 days would be perfect for some gatherings. I hope i'll have some fun time to get over her then.

Xiang ni bu shi bu hao,
Xiang ni zhi shi yi ger meng,
yong yuan dou bu hui xi xian de meng.

Off to sleep then. NiteZx

2006-08-06T02:06:00.000+08:00

i Feel .. dull.. and childish.

It's like i'm practically complaining about what ever happens without really tinking. I really dunno how to tink sometimes. It's like i'm doing things without tinking too. Is it the result of numbing my feelings and sealing it, leaving it in my heart.
I guess so.. it's bothering me..

U all read de letter and shd know...
All say "forget"
Yet... i really dunno... Is Chu Lian so hard to forget ?
Or i have shen shen de ai shang ta yi shan yi shi ler..

M i too childish to forget her and get her to do the same ?
Maybe she does.. not really know why ??
Or ? M i being stupid evaluating tis kind of stuff ? HAHAX..
maybe i m mad -__-.. luv..

7 is coming.. so is sep.. promos..
She promised*
i tink it won't come through..
i wish for her to realise.. and know..
though i know i cannot luv her as much as i can, becoz she have already hurt me.

What m i saying.. =X blahs..
It's hard to keep it in...
eye lips dropping liao.
I tink the gal that i prefers.. are all extinct.
Becoz i will nv b able to get them. So far, all 2 r like liddat. I tink a 3 rd one will b ? HAIS, y is it like tat ?? I dun wan richies, i wan de memories.. yet.. they'r all rich.
It has to be a men dang bu dui meh ??

NiteZx

2006-08-02T22:58:00.000+08:00

I didn't know what to blog any more ?

I dunno lahs... was playing O2 jam. Maybe it is something better than blogging ? Training my brain and fingers ? But isn't blogging the same thing ??

My feelings.. they are turning numb. BecoZ i have chosen to give it up. It is a transition period.
Becoz of my dad and her, i have chosen to let go of love.
DAd is walking about, making this entry abit hard to type...

Something... that i choose to keep in the most inner chambers of my heart.. did not end up very well when i released it. All i can say now is, it's like building a building with her, yet she took de very first floor of the building. i have to save all the people, in the building and bear it's crushing impact on my empire. Save all de people.. which is to erase.. all de memories of them with her.
dun understand ? nvm.. i tink i'm crapping too. Dunno what i typing.
Xin li de suan wei hao nan shou.

I choose to keep it in then. But i know what happens when i do. De ice will start forming. Coldness will grip me once more.. it'll take some time.. time will heal all wounds..
comforting myself, despite telling myself to let go and decided to.

i've decide to come in to blog, becoZ i can't stand it any more !! "Try to tink inverted"
Mr "mul" came in with all the rubbish.
Washing machine. Talked for the whole bloody 15 mins.
IF U HAVE SAVED UR JIAO WEI FER THAT TIME, WE WOULD HAVE LEARNED SOMETHING NEW.
So what if u have sat in that old school for 18 years ? SO WHAT IF U HAVE OR HAVE NOT ?
Does IT Satisfy u to see ppl dying right infront of ur face?
I so want to tell him in his face :
A man in de ocean, face the strong currents.
He is to survive them and get ashore (which is to get ahead in life)
Yet he is in treacheous waves and icy cold waters.
Conditions are tough.
Yet YOU, driving ur boat, moving past the so many of us in the ocean.
Some of us cling on, trying to rest for later.
Some of us swim and perserve on.
Yet, do you know ur boat will cause extra waves to de many waves already exsisting ?
Ever thot before ??
YOU look like a life guard, but actually u'r not. YOU look like a saviour, but u'r not.
YOU have the life buoy in YOUR hands.
Yet what u throw, is something with out a string. It's juZ support for a little longer.
Yet what u throw, is something with so little strength that the person can't even reach.
it's call, watching them die.
YOUR ship cannot reach the lands for us. We all know what.. but why don't u try something more simplicity and more less tedious..

All right, tat's my opinions, my thinking. If you so wanted to say "everyone has their teaching style" then so be it. Your Teaching..
Try checking in at the air port gate at 12.31 when ur flight is at 12.30.
Heard of "last call" ? Or it nv did imply in your life ? how society works ?
We no nid to tell us that. We'r already experiencing it..
I juZ hate it when u think too theortically.
When one miss a flight, is that what u deemed as "happy " for you ?
can't u tink of how sad it is to miss it and u'r there saying this kind of feng liang hua.
Buay tahan..
U made us tink, yet do u know how periods and stuff we have to go through each day ?
Do u really tink that, by doing so, it's really helping ?

What is helping and not helping ? Is jUZ that i can't really understand what de dam collegue teachers is tinking. Why can't they b more concerned, instead of giving us de "we r retarded students". I'm convinced at last, some of the teachers actually nv believed in us all. ALL ALONG.
They'r juz treating us like dirts. I dun mean to say this, but if u tink that teaching is a whore THEN GET OUT.
You wan theory ? I GIVE YOU. A teacher must understand, teach patientially and show care and concerned for their pupils. Is that what everyone is doing?

Define.. Define.. define.. ceteris paribus.. blah blah blah.. can life be defined ?? Or Is it too square for you to not accept it ?
Enough of him, waste time only. The REST ALSO. I tink i dun wan to type any more.
My right arm is still aching like hell, left arm slightly.

My only dream now, is to find "De GaL" n my bar. M i on another fairy tale ? Or m i not ? I won't know.. you tell me.
Let the dices roll, let the sands flow in the hourglasses.. n let the stars glow in the sky.
Under the purple moon upon the cloudy orange sky..
What is nightmare when u'r in hell..

NiteZx..

2006-08-01T11:27:00.000+08:00

Heyya !! Ever tried blogging during lessons ? Here 's one time !! =P

NOw i'm using the com in school.. quite lag.. Bye !!

2006-07-31T23:53:00.000+08:00

HeyyA !! I temporary applied my previous blog skin. Was using this around last year ? Hahax, before i changed quite a few too.. But it's still useable and pretty rite ? =)

Budden.. still got some technical problems. Nvm, tell me ur comments k ? De Taggy board's up.

Now i got time to blog, i dunno what to say suddenly. Everything was in such a rush. I didn't know what is what. o_O

Aii yo.. Jc is stressed. Seriously, I tink what Mr Chan LT says is right. Yes new Towners if u'r reading this, it's our v. "caring" n "most" concerned Chemistry teacher. Hahax, i'm sure u all remembered his holiday assignment being one of the biggest xmas holiday prezzie from sec 3 to 4 !! =P He said- Next year u'll encounter the most difficult exam u ever had. the promos.
Somehow i thot.. shd be manage able.. budden now i say muZ CHiong ar !!. Maybe his words did make sense, before i encounter A lvls, isn't promos the hardest test up to date ?
So .. Very.. De .. True..

Eyes in one i see again.
burning with hatred, or dis pleasure.
BeCoz of a loss of directions..
zZz.. what have i done wrong again to take tis ?
nVm.. after all.. it seems like what ever i do will displease someone.
My old school's seniors..
it wasn't easy..picking back what u left..
espiacelly when...

Argh.. what m i tinking of ?? Memories are clashing once again. Things in my heart are clearing.. like when the pond of water evaporates, leaving what's benearth to show... When i locked up certain things few years back, it was nv meant to be opened. Yet it broke under ur love...
i'm still mending back the pieces of memories that hurt. They hold de dreadful key of my past.

I would like to quote what Wei Xiang said in Ai Qing Ling Du.
" Do you believe in feelings? "" perharps the feelings was already there, it's juz u didn't realise it"
" take good care of the love, once it's gone dun regret it"

Other than that.. i WAN MORE TIME !! it's 12.30 when i finished this entry. I gonna have 4+ hrs sleep nia. zZz.. Gd NiteZx n Take CareZx all !!

2006-07-30T10:22:00.000+08:00

I know.. this blog skin suXs !! -__-
It's too plain. Hahax =P
ok it didn't really sux tat much, but well, i juz find it really really bad.. coz i randomly picked this. Gonna change tis one day...

I know there's no tag board, so bear with it for some time. Ty =)

Meanwhile.. If u were to ask me why i choose "blood sorrow".. well.. becoZ i couldn't use blood tears. If ur heart is crying, would it shed tears or blood ? Blood.. that's quite sort of obvious eh ? Coz u can't have water flowing in your blood streams can u ? Well.. tears only relate to one thing.. joy and sorrow. So i decided to use the "sad - der" part, together with blood.

Ever time i reveal my feelings, it seems like something is meant to be wrong, some where, somehow, some what. I hate it. It's like i had this imagination i was cursed before. Why ? I really dunno.. like one old lady walked up to me and waves her hand.
"Upon the power of love, you shall fail for some. But till you find someone who truely loves you, then thus the curse b broken." N she vanished. Maybe i was small to realise it then.
If u believed that story, then u r FOOLED !!
Hahax, it was juz a imaginative story i juz roughly cooked up while i blog.

Juz wondering, what if one day.. when my bar is opened, n she turns out.

My bar.. Considering and considering. I really wanna open a bar, since everyone loves to drink and stuff like that. Since i like chemistry and chemicals, i'd say i'll have a go at being a bar tender.
10% vodka + what ? I'm still a noob at these stuff. =P Ppl job attachment be secretary or what i tink i'll go work in a bar. Hahax !!
Most importantly, bars works out wonders somehow. You nv know who'll meet, maybe a start of something. It will be a place of wonders.. containing mixed feelings of sorrow ness and happiness. However, i shall tink my bar will be like an old meeting place for all. To Drink FoR FRIENDS !
To Drink For ETernity & Great Health !! =)

Hahax.. alittle deam of mine. That's all for now. I m really fine now. I tink becoz i have juz clear the shadows of my heart and locked up the darkness that affected me so much. it's time to look at this world again with a new look. My world is brighter now. =)

2006-07-18T00:01:00.000+08:00

Pirates Of The Carribean 2 - Dead Man's Chest RoXz !!

Juz went out to watch with my guild, LaBelleVita. =)
Fun.. Bao was talking rubbish as usual with Justin, kang and Fiona when i arrived at Suntec food court.
School was crap !
Forgot to bring tie, thot i was doomed.. Lucky Shi yong had an extra one.
Assembly, GP, PE, BREAK, Maths lecture, Chem Tutorial, Lunch, Econs Lecture then PW n GUILD OUTING !
I passed GP.. Wow... but failed everything else. 44.5 % = 45 % / 100
PE was physically training.
Break - rest and changed.
Maths wif Anour was CRAP.
"i'm so tired to call everyone to keep quiet and so tired to get all of you to settle down"
Wtf is ur problem ? De freaking LT is so bloody hot and stuffy, we juz had PE mind you ! Who wans to go to the LT earlier ? I Juz believe and almost convinced myself, tis place here is totally has no heart and co relationship of existence for us and teachers. It's not us, it's them. THEM who teach.
Jump back to last week where Ms Gan was saying " Have u ever come across teachers who teach for many years but still are not v. good in teaching? " I LOVED TO SAY.. "there's one right in front of us " One that has totally no respect.. In competition there is no mercy. Yet, there's something call friendly competition.
Places into the U are tough but Whether we make it or not, We learn, We Treasure, We Keep anything and everything we take along the path. It is u teachers that guide us along. CAN"T TEACHERS EVEN UNDERSTAND SUCH A SIMPLE LOGIC ? U"R NOT EVEN REQUIRED TO DO ANYTHING WRONG..
No.. They juZ refused to tink out of the box. STUDY STUDY STUDY.. BOX ! They nv did realise, despite the cruel elimination fact, victims hold to their heart their greatest memories. Unless u'r so practical, and tink that memories are useless, then WHAT R U AS A TEACHER ? Someone who teaches and teaches wif no caring of welfare ? Or has teaching drained the passionate of welfare from you, turning into a zombie ?
Chem tutorial was fine.. then Lunch..
went around finding Ms Yeo..
can't find.. Chee Hao says that not much ppl will turn up for wed's pract for non band members since it's like a free day for them. Gd point..
Econs lecture --> Mr Alex lum took over for lecture to give us the exam stuff aftermath briefing, pointing out mistakes and stuff liddat. I almost died. It was dam stuffy, but solved partially by the huge fan in front of us.. that wasn't worse. The tired us had to tahan his talk which he would not repeat, or in fact, talking rubbish -__-.. then he talk talk talk till we copy till sian. I tink 3/4 of the LT couldn't concentrate. Air Con gone, Monitor for Screen gone. I really wonder wat's next to happen.
PW.. idiotic and pathetic.
Ms Zeth was like crazy totally with De PW. It's like wth ! Talking abt how we walked in and dily deli her time for PW all tat took 5 mins. I guess everyone was tired after the Econs stuff and it was a tiring day, so it was 2.4x when we finally settled down. Talk so much crap, say dunno what we prepared 1 hr lecture but she finished early lahs. Some more 3.20 when she suppose to finish at 3.30. Still got time to talk so much rubbish, crap wadever u call it as long as it doesn't make sense and throw so many sacasism at us.
I REPEAT : - in hokkien -" Gong Wei Jiu Ho, Mai Gong JIAO WEI "
Du Lan ed or Du lan past tense =P.. totally f up lahs.

Too tired to bother abt much stuff actually.. nIteZx

2006-07-15T10:21:00.000+08:00

I nv thot, i had to do it again.
Close that blog and leave it to rot...

Some things are better off leaving it to time.. Tis blog shall not bear much of the shadow of the past.. though.. i m already haunted by the shadows of yesterday.

In any case, my mid years are all gone case ler. =X the cause ? Not because i didn't study, i tink all of you else know why. Something juz happened right before the first paper.

It's been 3 weeks.. Looking forward to things actually, yet shattered right in front of my eyes. I'll come out with a template soon bahs..
Blog skins.. what shd i get? c how i feel bahs..